Don't You Forget About Me
by ohxrosie
Summary: Starts during Super Cool Party People, but with a twist. Logan wakes up with his head in 2004, and Rory needs to make a descision - if she had to go through everything again, would she? T for now. WARNING: depressing in places.
1. Back to the Beginning

_Chapter One:__ Back to the Start._

"We should be there soon Love." A thick Australian accent informed her across the phone line, "Oh, and we'll bring supplies. Real coffee, real food. That hospital food sucks. I remember one time when –ow! Alright, alright! I'm hanging up! Relax Colin! See you soon doll!"

The dial tone rang in Rory's ear as she flipped her phone closed and shut her eyes. This was hell. She had been sitting in a hospital over night, still in her clothes, hair and makeup for her best friends wedding. She smelled of her mothers tequila shots and she hadn't had a decent cup of coffee in… oh, a good twenty hours.

"Excuse me miss?" A timid and slightly portly nurse approached her, tapping her on the shoulder to take her out of her semi-slumber. "Are you here for Logan Huntzberger?" She asked timidly.

"Yes, I'm his girlfriend." She answered, alertness seeped back into her.

"He's gaining consciousness. You can visit him if you want to." Rory gave the woman a sincere smile before thanking her and rushing in the direction of Logans room. She had so many things to say, so many things to apologize for.

"Hey," she said softly as she walked into the room, "how're you doing?" Stupid question Rory. He fell off a cliff for goodness sake!

"Umm, hi." Logan replied, flashing a smile that was still as charming as ever… even in his smashed up state. "I'm feeling like a guy in a hospital bed." There was something off about the way he looked at her, he was distant. He was like she had been when she just let him walk out that door. She had been so cold, so distant! She knew what a stupid idea that trip was and she didn't even try and stop him! She should have stopped him!

"I'm so sorry Logan." She said softly, her eyes sweeping over his confused face.

"For…?" He looked at her as though she was some foreign creature, she took a step backwards and with it a moment to compose herself. She needed to apologize. Even if he didn't want to talk about it. She knew he felt the coldness too.

"For being so cold, so… distant. For letting you walk out that door. I was punishing you. I didn't mean to, but you were right. I hadn't forgiven you for the bridesmaids. I-I could have lost you Logan." She took a few steps closer to his bed, waiting for a response. Anything.

The next words that came out of his mouth surprised her, "Do you have the right room?" She stepped back again in surprise. She was finding it hard to tell if he was joking or not. Why was he being so hard to read?

Just then a young, bubbly and very blonde nurse floated into the room with some vitamins and painkillers for Logan to take. "Anything I can do for you?" She asked in an annoyingly high pitched voice as she placed the tray before him.

"Some water and your number would be appreciated." Logan supplied in a very Finn-esque manner.

The nurse blushed, his charm as strong as ever, even through his slightly disfigured body. "I'll be right back." She bit her bottom lip in a flirtatious manner before leaving a grinning Logan and shocked Rory alone in the room.

Even in a hospital he was a charmer. Even with a girlfriend he was a charmer. Rory felt tears prickling in her eyes as she tried furiously to keep them at bay. She stayed here all night for him! She set Paris on the nursing staff for him! Would his painkillers be enough to placate her broken heart?

"You know what Logan," she choked out, "I thought using your sister was low, but this tops it all. You're an ass Logan. Finn and Colin should be here any minute now, you should hope they're more sympathetic." She turned on her heel and stormed out of the hospital room. This was low. Even for Logan, king of bad break-ups, this was low. Rory waited until she was seated firmly in the waiting room before she broke down into her own world of tears.

Logan looked after the strange girl confused, she was obviously upset about something, though he couldn't for the life of him remember what. He had been pretty wasted the last few days, maybe he did something drunk and stupid on the boat near Fiji.

True to her word Colin and Finn gushed into the room minutes later.

"He's alive!" They both cheered in surprise and merriment, Logans face brightened upon seeing his best friends faces. He was glad they didn't get too banged up when the boat sunk.

"Hey guys!" Logan said happily as the blonde nurse came back in with a bottle of water and a piece of paper containing her number on it. Logan grinned at her as she gave him a flirtatious smile and walked out, an obvious sway in her step. He turned back to his friends who were looking at him in horror. "What?"

"What's that?" Colin asked hesitantly, motioning towards the piece of paper.

"Her number." Logan said with another smirk.

"Why do you need her number?" Colin asked, again his voice was full of hesitance and worry.

"Because she's hot…" Logan said as though it was the most obvious thing in the world. His friends just stood there, staring at him, their faces as pale as ghosts. "God, it's just her number! What's with people? The girl in here before acted even worse! Just because it's a hospital doesn't mean I can't pick up!"

"G-Girl in here earlier?" Finn asked, a look of worry and anger flushing through his features. "Shit. Rory." With those few words he sprinted out of the room and could be seen frantically searching around the hospital waiting room through the window, he scooped the brunette girl from earlier out of a chair and embraced her tightly as her body shook with sobs.

"Logan…" Colin began, his hesitancy replaced with repressed anger now, "What's wrong with you?"

"What's wrong wit me? What's wrong with you… I mean, you were sane –no, saner in Fiji. Now, you've both cracked it! Is this some morphine induced hallucination?"

"Fiji!?" Panic and urgency joined the anger in Colin's voice, "What do you mean Fiji? What's the last thing you remember Logan?"

"The boat sinking in Fiji…" Logan turned his head towards Colin and cocked his head to the side in a bemused fashion.

"You're not messing are you?" Colin asked, though it was clearly rhetorical. His face had taken an even paler shade as he slumped down into one of the chairs in Logans room, occasionally looking out the window at the couple who stood there, still embracing and both crying now.

"Colin. What's going on?" Logan asked, starting to panic himself now.

"That's Rory," Colin said meekly, his head in his hands, rubbing his forehead furiously, "You started dating six months after Fiji. God Logan, please telling me you're kidding. This is so not funny."

"Six months?" Logan spat, shocked and confused, "How is that possible? It's… it's. No, I don't have a girlfriend. I don't do girlfriends. What's going on?"

"Logan… it's spring 2006."

"What? No! That's… that's not possib- what? She's my girlfriend? How'd Shira get me into that?" Tears brimmed in both boys eyes as they sat there, staring into the confusing void of thoughts.

Colin looked at him, stunned by Logans accusation, "Rory isn't like that. Don't… don't hurt her anymore Logan."

"What? So now… I end up in a hospital, god knows how, and I'm stuck with some chick who for all I know is a gold digging bimbo?" Logan's voice was rising with anger, this situation was too much for him, and how could they expect him to be sympathetic towards her?

"She's not a bimbo… or a gold digger, she wants to be a reporter, she-"

"Oh, so it's the connections then? Great. This sucks Colin!"

"I know, but it's not like that, she's-"

"I don't want to hear about her." Logan said bitterly, trying to sit up further, but the pain in his ribs halting him.

"You're an idiot Logan." Colin said in a scarily calm voice as he followed Finns example and left the room to join the crying twosome, but no before pulling a newspaper out of the plastic bag he was carrying in and tossing it at Logan.

Logan looked at the date on the paper before turning his eyes back to the three figures in the waiting room.

"Shit."

-----

Rory's breathing became haggard as she struggled to inhale the life give gas. Each breath she took pained her more than the last. Each movement a stab to the heart.

"Fiji? But… he's –he doesn't… I don't exist." Her eyes were wide with shock as she slumped back into the waiting chair, followed closely by an equally shocked Finn. The three pairs of eyes were all tear stained and puffy. All three brains were working on overdrive, yet could find nothing in the thick fog of thoughts that surrounded them.

Rory stood up and began pacing the room, fully aware of the pairs of eyes following her and giving them no recognition at the same time. "Go back in. Sit with him." She demanded, turning to the shell shocked boys.

"But Love-" Finn started, worried about the girl he had grown to love as family.

"I'll be fine Finn. I have things to do. It's just another break-up right?" The pleading in her voice was tear inducing.

Colin nodded solemnly, "Yeah… just another break-up."

Rory gave him a sad but grateful smile as she ushered them into the hospital room, not daring to look at Logan for fear of breaking down. She couldn't break down now. Not yet. She couldn't make it real.

She pulled out her phone and flicked through her phone book, looking for a rarely used number. She could kill two birds with on stone as the saying went.

"Mitchum?" Oh, she could get rid of the anger alright.

-----

"So…" Logan began, his insides hurting not from the broken bones, torn cartilage and uncomfortable braces, but from the sense of loss. One and a half years, in a blink of an eye. "Did I miss much?" he asked lightly, not wanting to make the situation any more depressing.

"Nope, same old same old." Finns laugh came out gurgled as it mixed with the repressed sobs.

"But hey, you finally beat Robert in poker." Colin added wanting dearly to grin like Logan did when he heard this.

"How was Fiji?" Logan asked, he didn't want to talk about anything bigger at the moment, not Yale, not his father… not Rory. "I mean, after the boat sunk."

"Umm, honestly mate? I don't remember." Finn confessed, "I think we were all too wasted."

Logan laughed a little, "At least I didn't miss anything there."

A sober silence engulfed the room and the boys let tears prick in the corner of their eyes as they all huddled together, comforted by their close proximity and lack of words. Words did no good. While they were all together they could feel normal. Nothing felt any different when they were in silence.

"Finn, Colin?" Rory asked as she stuck her head around the corner, averting her eyes from Logan. The teary eyed boys turned to her, she had to talk to them before she lost her nerve. "I'll just take a second." The boys nodded and walked over to the door where Rory was standing.

"Hey." Colin said meekly, brushing the tears from the corner of his eyes with the back of his wrist.

"I'm going to go home now… I don't think… I don't think he wants me here. You guys catch up. Honor's on the next plane back… I also called Mitchum again, that was a bit of fun," She let out a bitter laugh that was more depressing than cheerful, "I'll box up some stuff for him to have here… and I'll… I'll move out of the apartment before next week. Oh, and I talk to the doctor, they can't do a CAT scan or anything until the braces on his back are removed, then he'll go into some serious tests to find out if he'll ever…" She couldn't bring herself to say that word. Remember. Memories. They were what made break-ups different, the fact that she knew Dean could still think of her, she knew Jess remembered the good times. At the end of this relationship she was alone. She was the only one who knew about it. It was like an imaginary boyfriend. "Can I... can I talk to him? I want to –I need to say… I need to say goodbye." She let out a small sob and the boys stood aside to let her have her final moments with the boy who had meant the world to her for the past year.

"Hey again." She said softly, approaching his side.

"Rory, look-"

"No. I don't want to hear it Logan." She said sadly, "I'm just here to say goodbye. I've taken care of some things. I hope you'll be alright. I really do. You're an amazing person Logan, don't tell yourself that you can't do something. You can do anything, you just have to believe in yourself. Did we learn nothing from 'Mad Hot Ballroom?'" She let out a strangled laugh at the memory. "So, I guess this is goodbye. I'll miss you." She bent down and kissed his cheek, inhaling his sent for the last time before turning and heading towards the door. "I love you." She whispered so softly that he barely heard her.

Go outside. Hail a cab. Go home.

It was just like 'socks then shoes' right?

She'd never done anything harder in her life.

How she made it to that bed is a blur of images and emotions. That part of her life was over. The days spent with Logan, the hours, the minutes, gone. Only to be known to her, and her alone. Martha's Vineyard, the jump, the coffee cart and everything else her life has become. Alone. Loneliness was the worst predicament. She missed him already.

She inhaled the familiar scent of Logans pillow and cried herself to a restless half sleep.

-----

Logan sat in the hospital bed staring blankly at the door as it swung shut behind the distraught brunette and his two friends entered shortly after her. For the first time since he woke up he felt complete loss, though he had no idea what he was missing. His sister used to get that feeling all the time, she would check and double check her purse to find what she was missing, only to find she had everything. This was worse. Much, much worse. There was so much emotion in the goodbye, yet it was wrong. Like a stranger on the street running up to you and sharing those innermost turmoil's.

"Honor's getting the first plane back; she'll be here as soon as possible." Colin said in a lost attempt at comfort.

"Where's she now?" Logan asked, still recovering from the strange goodbye.

Colin paled and gave Logan a sympathetic look, "She's, uh, on her honeymoon."

"Honor got married?" Logan asked, his eyes tearing up as his friends nodded solemnly. "Josh?" He choked the singular word through his tears as his friends again confirmed his assumption.

There was a period of silence, much like there is when we remember soldiers, or those who have died. Though this was no silence of remembrance, there was nothing to remember. That's what made this silence so heartbreaking.

"You lied to me." Logan said with an attempt at a lighthearted smile.

His friends looked up at him confused before he continued, "You said I didn't miss out on much."

Fin shook his head with almost sincere laughter, "Ignorance is bliss mate."

"Damn straight." Logan confirmed and the conversation turned slightly more tolerable.

Night fell and his friends left for the night with promises of their return. The silence of the hospital would have deafened him were it not for the screaming flurry of thoughts occupying his head. Would he remember? Did he want to remember?

Part of him said no.

-----

"You think she's here?" Finn stage whispered to Colin the next morning as they approached the door to Logans apartment.

"No, I doubt she would have wanted to spend the night here. She's probably at her mums house… or god forbid, Paris' place. That woman scares me. But I'm putting my money on the mothers place… I think they're pretty close. No way would she want to be alone in this place, too many memories." Colin's normal volume of voice was in strong contrast to Finns whisper.

"Poor girl…" Finn stated, still using his loud whisper.

"You don't need to whisper," Colin sounded slightly agitated as he unlocked the door to Logans apartment with the spare key.

"SHHH! The lights are off… but you never know." Finn was ignorant of the colour rising in Colin's cheek. It was too early to deal with his friends strange ways.

"Idiot! It's eight in the morning! It's already light outside… that _might_ explain why the lights are off Sherlock!" Colin exclaimed, slightly exasperated, glaring at Finn as he walked into the apartment.

"By God! You're right!" Finn's voice was suddenly loud and even more attention grabbing, "Why am I up at such an ungodly hour?"

"You never went to sleep Finn!" Colin growled, his patience wearing dangerously thin.

"Someone's crabby when they don't get their beddy-bye!" Finn exclaimed in a sing-song voice as he waved his arms around ludicrously.

"And whose fault is that Finn?"

"Colly-Wolly needs some Sleepy-Weepy!"

"Finn." Colin warned.

"Rock-a-bye baby, in the tree top-"

"That's it!" Colin lunged across at Finn, pulling them both onto the couch where Colin proceeded to try and hit Finn repeatedly over the head.

Finn, recovering from the immediate shock of the surprise attack pushed Colin off him, causing Colin to slam into the side of the coffee table, sending magazines flying. Finn lunged off the couch and onto Collins back. Colin let out a screech of shock and pain as Finn pulled his arm behind him and sunk his teeth into the sweater covered flesh.

"Guys?" A soft voice coming from the bed across the room caused the boys to stop mid brawl, both wondering how they hadn't spotted her earlier.

Colin yanked his arm from Finns grip and stood up, causing the Australian to stumble backwards behind the couch. Colin straightened out his clothing and took a good look at the teary eyed female.

"Rory?" Finn asked, his head popping up from behind the sofa. "Why are you here? Colin said you'd be at your mums."

"I live here Finn, why are you- oh! The boxes! One second!" Rory started to zoom about the room grabbing various things she knew that Logan would need with him at the hospital, Hemmingway, Nick Hornby, Thompson… then an idea struck her as her hand came across a familiar book. Asher Fleming. She had found a way to ingrain parts of her life, parts of her, into his life. Even if he would never know her.

After picking up all the possessions she knew that Logan would want at the hospital she sealed the two medium sized boxes and handed one to each of the boys who stood gaping at her from near the couch. Their eyes spoke volumes, regret, surprise, sorrow and sympathy.

"Rory… you don't have to do all this." Colin said softly.

"I know, but I'm going to anyway. I want him to be happy. It's hard for me, but it's harder for him right?" She looked so desperate, she was snatching at anything to keep her sane. To keep her together.

"Oh, doll!" Finn said, placing his box down to embrace her in a hug.

Rory stepped back. "Don't patronize me Finn." Finn stopped, slightly shocked at what she had said. She covered her mouth with her hands as tears brimmed in her eyes. "I'm so sorry!" She cried out as she rushed forward to hug him tightly. She pulled back and stared at the two people she had grown so used to having in her life.

"We're still friends right?" She asked, the question seeming urgently alarming at that moment in time.

"Always." Colin gave her a wan smile and embraced her in a hug as well.

The boys picked up their boxes and made their way to the elevator. Not wanting to say their goodbyes. It wasn't goodbye for them. This wouldn't change anything.

Rory felt as though she had left a small piece of herself in those boxes. It was strangely satisfying, oddly soothing. She was still a part of his life, however unrecognizable and small it was. She wasn't completely gone. Not yet.

-----

Updated 8th March 2008.

_So, I'm plotting this story completely before writing it. I have all these little tidbits planned out and it's fairly exciting.__ What's more important, the history we share with someone, or the chemistry and the memories that aren't made yet?_

_Tell me what you think in your reviews, history or possibility?_

…_and please tell me what you think, I really love this idea. Do I need to grovel more? The GO! Button is waiting._


	2. Remembering the Melody

_Chapter Two__: Remembering the Melody._

Logan ran his hands lazily over the cover of a book he was now certain that he had never seen before, at first he assumed he must have seen it, read it, bought it, or something. Then he looked at the date of publication. He doubted he'd done much reading in Fiji. Thinking about the book was like trying to remember a melody, yet the song just wouldn't fall into place. He thought about how when he would try and remember the name of an actor, or a movie, he would use various tidbits of information to get there. _She was in Pirates of the Caribbean… sounds like Night? Brown hair. That's right! Keira Knightly!_ But that was so much easier. What was he remembering, did he want to remember it? To figure out the song, he'd have to know the lyrics right? So, he should open the book? He placed the book on the table next to his bed. Maybe later, Asher Fleming.

"Ok, we're back!" Colin declared, walking into the room shopping bags under his arms.

"Thanks for the boxes guys, they're perfect." Logan grinned, gesturing to the piles of his belongings. The mix of books was perfect, some he hadn't read, or at least, didn't remember reading, but was intrigued by none the less, and some of his all time favorites. The DVDs were from every time period, mostly cheerful comedies (who wants to watch something emotional in a hospital right?), like Monty Python, but also some fun action movies. Again, the perfect mix of old and new. Then there were some pictures, mainly him with Honor, or Finn and Colin. Nothing too depressing, nothing that made him think of everything he missed. That was why the Asher Fleming book stood out so much. It didn't fit with the theme of the box. It was the odd one out.

"Um yeah… the boxes… glad you like them." Colin mumbled, not making eye contact. "Anyway... we bought you some magazines.

Finn poured out a plastic bag filled with Playboy and Rolling stone magazines. Logan laughed, his friends really did think of everything.

"We figured she wouldn't put these in the boxes." Finn grinned. Logan looked at him confused, "OW! What was that for mate?"

"Watch your tongue Finn!" Colin hissed back at Finn.

"Rory made the boxes didn't she?" Logan asked, knowing full well the answer.

"Yeah mate, she zoomed around the apartment like she was on fire." Finn grinned at the memory while Colin continued to glare at him.

"Colin, I don't care. It's alright for you to talk about her, she's your friend. I've come to terms that I probably wasn't with her for the sex alone." Logan grinned when Colin pulled a disgusted face.

"Ugh! Rory and sex should not be talked about together, she's too… too innocent." Colin cringed visibly, "She's like my sister."

"You think she's innocent now, you should have seen her in high school." Finn giggled.

"You knew her in high school?" Colin asked.

"No, I saw a you tube video of her in high school. It's hilarious"

"I have to see that!" Colin declared, "'If it's anything like our videos from high school…"

"'I'll show it to you." Finn reached into one of the many bags behind him and pulled out a laptop. He set it up on the foot of Logans bed and sat back, waiting for the computer to load on its own.

"Uh, Finn… why do you have a laptop?" Logan spoke up after a while.

"Well why not?" Finn countered.

"Because you're in a hospital…"

"Yeah, so what better place to have a laptop?" Finn looked sincerely disappointed at Logans lack of deductive skills.

"Oh, yeah, of course Finn," Logan humored while his friend flicked through the different available wifi networks.

A few minutes later Finn had the video up on screen and was waiting eagerly with Colin while Logan looked on hesitantly behind them. It felt wrong to be watching some video about someone you don't know… but then again, people do that all the time right? It was more the knowing without knowledge that was bothering. He sighed and directed his eyes to the screen.

"… _I'm not going to Harvard. I got the tiny envelope, the one that reads, "Sorry, Paris. We're not interested. Try again next year. Love, Harvard." And the thing that's really funny here is, who in the world deserves to go to Harvard more than me? Have you seen how hard I've worked over these past four years? I mean, can anyone here believe that I'm not going to Harvard? I can't. I'm not going to Harvard. I am not going to Harvard. I had sex, but I'm not going to Harvard. __She's never had sex__. She'll probably go to Harvard. She's a shoe in!"_

"Oh my God!" Colin laughed before falling backwards onto the waiting chair in a fit of giggles. "To have your virginity declared over C-Span? Wow! Just… wow."

"You can not tell reporter girl you say that, ok? She'd die." Finn said as he bit back his own giggles after watching the video.

"Isn't Harvard all the way in Boston?" Logan asked stupidly.

"She goes to Yale." Colin informed him, recovering from his prior laughter.

"How many schools did she get into?" Logan asked, he wanted to know. He actually wanted to. If the strange goodbye hadn't sparked his curiosity, he video sure did. This girl seemed so obscure, so perfect in an 'everything-goes-wrong' kind of way.

"Princeton, Harvard and Yale." Finn replied nonchalantly.

"That's pretty impressive. How do you know all this Finn?" Colin looked at Finn curiously as Finns eyes darted around the room nervously.

"I… um… kind of, uh, got her drunk and started a game of 20 questions." he confessed, "Just to make sure she's good enough for Logan."

"And is she good enough?" Logan asked as Finn started to pack up his laptop.

"At first I thought she was," Finn started, "then she offered to be our designated driver. Logan, that girl is _way _too good for you."

"Hey!" Logan cried, "I resent that!"

"You shouldn't man." Colin let out an audible sigh, "Anyway… I'm going to go grab a drink from the vending machine, you want anything?"

"I'm good."

"Nah, I'll be fine, mate. Don't worry about me!" Finn called out to Colin's retreating back, slightly miffed that Collin hadn't asked him.

"And then there were two." Logan sighed, looking at Finn who was shifting around impatiently in his seat. Logan followed his line of vision to see a pretty red haired nurse sitting behind the station. "Go flirt Finn." Logan sighed, Finn didn't need to be told twice, he was out of there as soon as the words had left Logans mouth.

Logan turned to the book on his bedside table for the second time. Perhaps it wasn't such a bad thing to remember. What was the fuss about anyway, it's not like he's going to open a book and suddenly remember everything.

Logan sighed and turned to book over in his hands. _No time like the present…_

He opened the cover of the book and there it was. Not a word, not a prase, not a meaning. An image. A small black and white image that was supposed to inform the reader about the author told Logan so much more.

" _We sincerely apologize, and we will now leave you to finish putting up your poster of... this really old guy."_

"_Professor Asher Fleming."_

_  
__"What, they were out of Orlando Bloom?"_

_  
__" Professor Fleming died last week. We're throwing him a wake."_

_  
__" Okay, so were you and Fleming…?"_

_  
__" No!"_

The memories came through so clear that he couldn't comprehend how he hadn't remembered them before.

"_YOU SANK MY YACHT?!"_

"_No dad, Finn sank the yacht."_

"_I can't believe you airheads! That was a fine yacht, Logan!"_

"_Hey, at least there were no hospital visits this time…"_

Just a couple of week's worth of memories. Just over a years worth of hope.

"_Who are you going out with tonight, Logan?"_

"_Sarah, one of the blonde twins."_

"_Did the fiery brunette girl turn you down, mate?"_

"_She's Marty's friend… didn't like me too much."_

"_Who's Marty?"_

"_Exactly."_

Still, none of the events gave him any clue why he was here. How he ended up practising monogamy with the angry brunette. How he ended up falling off a cliff in Costa Rica.

"She's married, you doing alright Logan?" Finn plonked himself back down into the chair next to Logan's bed after his failed attempt at wooing the red haired nurse.

"Huh? Oh yeah, I'm peachy. Bummer about the nurse though."

-----

_KNOCK! KNOCK! KNOCK!_

Rory looked at her reflection in the mirror and wiped her eyes. She looked tired, but still presentable.

"Rory Darling! Open up! I have news!" Juliet's voice was on the other side of her front door; Rosemary was in toe as well.

Rory walked over to the front door and sure enough, there they were. Juliet gushed into the apartment with a stupid grin on her face while Rosemary followed closely behind.

"I've found him Rory! I've found my soul mate!" Juliet said in a dreamy voice, "He's dirt poor, working like fifty jobs and not afraid of commitment like last boyfriend."

"So soul mate's a catch then?" Rory said gloomily, she was so far from wanting to talk about soul mates and boyfriends right now.

"Oh, TDH is _the _catch. His last few relationships couldn't stand his work load –although, they were pretty poor too I think… anyway, I think that we'll be engaged within a year, he'll sign the nuptials and I can start eating!" Juliet cried with glee, it was such a sad goal in life, but a goal none the less.

"TDH?" Rory questioned, unfamiliar with the bubbly females terms.

"Oh, stands for tall dark and handsome. Which, of course, he is!" Juliet's face finally sobered, "Oh Rory honey, what's wrong?"

"Oh, you know… Logan in the hospital and stuff…" Rory answered vaguely, hoping that the girls knew enough to catch on. No such luck.

"Last I heard he was showing signs of waking up… I probably should stop by… hmm. He was expected to make a full recovery though… that hasn't changed has it?" Rory could hear the panic in Rosemary's voice, however that didn't in anyway bring the self sorrow she felt to an end.

"He, uh," She held back tears, threatening to overflow, "Can't remember anything after Fiji. The doctors say that short term memory loss is common after a head trauma… though only five, ten seconds or so. He lost a year and a half. Not quite so common anymore. Logan was never one for ordinary though." She shut her eyes for a moment, willing herself to become composed, "He doesn't remember me, we broke-up."

"Oh, darling!" Juliet wrapped Rory up in her arms as tears started descending down both girls faces. Once the two pulled apart, Juliet pulled out her phone and started talking to the person on the other end.

"It's like a bad movie." Rosemary sat on the sofa, shock evident in her countenance.

The girls sat around, content in each others company for what felt like hours, but was merely nineteen minutes.

_KNOCK! KNOCK! KNOCK!_

"Food's here." Juliet stated as she stood up and opened the door, letting a middle aged man in a chauffers suit walk into the house carrying half a dozen full bags of junk food and some DVDs. "What?" Juliet asked, looking at Rory's stunned expression, "You can't expect us to let this news go down without a wallow."

"What about not eating until you've gotten TDH down the aisle?"

"Screw TDH."

That was exactly what Rory needed to hear. She needed to hear that she wasn't over reacting, she needed to hear that this sucked. She needed a girls night.

-----

Lorelai slumped down on the couch, her hangover had subsided, finally. She was never going to drink tequila again, that is, until next time. She picked up her phone and dialled a well rehearsed number.

"Hello?"

"Hey honey, it's me. The woman who gave you life, just though you might like to inform me on the recent, possibly life changing events… you've forgiven Logan after the hospital scare?"

"Oh yeah, completely forgotten. Literally. Can you blame someone for something when in some twisted way they haven't actually done it yet?" Rory said bitterly.

"Rory, are you drunk?" sensing a lack of soberness in her child's voice.

"No, just slightly tipsy. I had some friends over to wallow, they've just left"

"Wallow for what? Logan's alright isn't he? Oh my God! Honey! What happened?" Lorelai said, starting to assume the worst and wishing she were with her daughter and not on the other side of the phone line.

"Oh, Logan's great… he's just recovering from life threatening injuries and can't remember the past, oh, year and a half of his life. Including me."

Her outburst was matched with stunned silence, what could one stay to that.

"And no, before you asked. This isn't a bad movie. This is a sucky, sucky week. I've now said 'sucks' so much that the word has lost all meaning."

"Honey, I'm so, so, sorry."

"Can I ask you a favour?"

"Anything honey."

"Can you bring Luke's truck over next Sunday? I have to move out. I'll see if Paris is alright with moving in. You know, I didn't think this actually happened to people, it's all so… so surreal." Rory sighed. Reality sucked.

"Sure kid. I'll even get up early. And if it's any consolation, I didn't disapprove of him as much as I would have liked to." Rory had to smile at this; there was always one person she could count on no matter what. Her mum would always be her best friend.

"Sorry about not getting you off the stage earlier the other night." Her mother cringed when her daughter mentioned her infamous experience at Lane's wedding.

"It's alright, Miss Patty has it under wraps."

"You're really alright?" Rory asked, not entirely convinced.

"No, but you're sad… and probably couldn't've stop me anyway." Lorelai smiled, it was such a Rory thing to do to ask about other people when she was depressed. It was partly out if selflessness, and partly out of selfishness, absorb herself in other peoples problems rather than face her own.

"So, I'll see you bright and early Sunday morning?" Rory asked, hopefully. She was desperate to see her mother.

"Less bright, more Sunday."

"Love you mum!"

"I love you too, kid."

Lorelai hung up the phone and sighed. She wanted so much to hate Logan, her daughter was heartbroken because of him. Yet this time it wasn't his fault. This time he had been trying to fix things for them, fight for them. Then he jumped off a cliff. Idiot.

The phone ringing brought Lorelai out of her thoughts and back to the real world, she picked up the phone and held it to her ear.

"Rory?" She asked, wondering if her daughter had called her back.

"Lorelai? It's Paris." Lorelai let out a small sigh of disappointment, she was really worried about Rory.

"Hey Paris."

"Don't sound too excited." Paris responded sarcastically.

"Sorry Paris, how can I help you?"

"Have you spoken to Rory recently?"

"I just got off the phone with her then."

"How is she? I heard about Logan, he's an idiot! Is she ok? Is she dropping out of Yale? She's the only stable thing in my life right now –don't give me that look Doyle!" Paris snapped over the phone line.

"She's… healing." Lorelai responded, not entirely sure if that was a truth. "Expect a call from her, she needs a place to stay."

"She's always welcome here."

"Thanks Paris… can you do me a favour?" Lorelai asked softly.

"Sure."

"Can you make sure she's really ok? Make sure she's eating… living." They were both silent for a moment, as if both grasping the severity of the situation.

"Of course. I'll do whatever I can."

"Thanks Paris. Thank you so much."

"Bye Lorelai."

Lorelai was met with the dial tone for a second time that day. Rory was definitely going to be eating with Paris around.

-----

"Ok, just sign here, confirming that you have no tattoos, metal implants etcetera… make sure you read through it thoroughly. Then we can get you set up for the brain scan." The neurologist told him as he handed Logan a form and pen.

"Thanks, um, is there anything in particular I should do if my memory does come back?" Logan asked hesitantly, he still hadn't told anyone about his recently regained memories. It was like he was living two lives, part of him was stuck in 2004, while the rest of him was living in 2006 and not knowing what was happing in between.

"Not really, I wouldn't get my hopes up too high… you never know when these memories are going to come back, but it isn't unheard of. I can't really give personal advice like that."

"Oh, uh, yeah. Sure. Shouldn't get my hopes up."

Logan finished reading through the forms, signed them and handed them back to the doctor.

"So, is Rory here to see you in?" the doctor asked as he sorted through some paperwork and filed the recently signed forms.

"Um, no… how do you know her?" This girl was popping up everywhere. She would be the death of him.

"She set up this appointment; it's always nice to know someone cares for you like that. She's a very lovely girl."

Logan grimaced. She was completely ingrained in his life in ways that he couldn't even recognise, it was a confronting feeling to be faced with this person, this life, that he knew so much about, yet nothing about _who _she was. He wanted to know her more, but he knew that they were on completely different pages. She was in love with him, he didn't want that. How could he talk to her without getting her hopes up? How could he tell people he was remembering without getting their hopes up?

"So, getting ready for the CAT scan?" Logan asked, happy not to think about these things, he hated consequences.

-----

"So, how was the CAT scan?" Colin asked as he dealt out the cards evenly.

"Boring, I just lay still for half an hour. They said nothing was affected other than my memory, so I can't say I'm mentally disabled."

"Bummer," Finn said, "I always wanted a mentally disabled friend."

"So you're not alone Finny?" Colin asked in a condescending manner, unfortunately the jab went straight over Finns head.

Logan looked at cards, one stood out to him more than the others. Ace of hearts. Déjà vu.

"Logan? Logan? You going to call or are you just going to gape at your cards all day? Some poker face…" Colin muttered the last part under his breath.

"Oh, yeah… I'm in."

"Logan?" A booming voice called out from the door, three heads swung in the direction of the voice in surprise.

"Dad?"

"Hey. How're you going?" Mitchum asked, trying his best to ignore the confused looks coming from the three younger men in the room.

"Um. I'm alright… what are you doing here?"

"You're in the hospital, why wouldn't I be here?"

"No reason… so, how's life?" It felt strange having a conversation with his father, it was something that he never did before. It was always about business, or living up to your true potential. Never about… just stuff.

"I also bought you a present. I thought that 'Get Well Soon' balloons didn't quite cut it…" Mitchum sighed and pulled an envelope out of the pocket inside his suit jacket, "I got you this."

Logan reached out and took the envelope from his fathers hand. He opened it slowly, as if afraid something was going to jump out at him from inside it.

Inside were pictures. Pictures of a pristine, white yacht, tied up securely to the Harbour. It was unnamed, waiting to be christened, waiting to be used.

"All you have to do is get well and then you can name her and take her out to sea. I figured that balloons don't give you that much support, this will give you some incentive to get better. So, once you have a name, let me know and I'll get someone to paint it on ASAP." Mitchum gave is son a stiff yet sincere smile while the younger Huntzberger continued to stare at him in shock. It was a sweet gesture, and so Mitchum, wanting Logan to work towards something. Still, whatever interior motives Logan could have dug into, he decided to receive the present as it was –a gift from father to son.

"Th-Thanks dad. This is… perfect."

"Given that a yacht sinking is the last thing you remember, what's better than starting up again with a yacht sailing?"

"Yeah… perfect." Logan muttered, not up to informing his company of his newly acquired memories. "And dad?"

"Yes son?"

"I know what I want to name her."

-----

_So, before you get all angsty for Rogan interaction. Think of the memories and interweaving of their lives as an interaction of their own. Please stick with the story, I have the plot planned out and while it may take a little while to get to where some people are always so desperate to get to, it wouldn't be the story if you don't have to wait. I hope to update quickly._

_Also, if things get too depressing, I'm sorry._

_Please review, I want to know what you think about the boys' 'Stand by Me'-ish moment and Mitchums appearance, along with the story in general._


	3. Ace

-----

_**CLARIFICATION: **__Logan now remembers everything up until just after his second meeting with Rory (When Finn was looking for the soul mate with the red hair and a short name). He remembers NOTHING after that. Warning; serious cliffhangers ahead!_

-----

_Chapter T__hree: Ace._

"_Given that a yacht sinking is the last thing you remember, what's better than starting up again with a yacht sailing?"_

"_Yeah… perfect." Logan muttered, not up to informing his company of his newly acquired memories. "And dad?"_

"_Yes son?"_

"_I know what I want to name her."_

"Great," Mitchum said, "just tell me the name and I'll get her ready for as soon as you're out of here."

"Ace."

"Ace?" Mitchum asked, confirming that that was the actual name of the boat and not some abnormal young persons slang.

"Yeah. I'm calling her Ace."

Finn and Colin stared at him bewildered, "Bloody hell, mate." Finn muttered, the first of the two to speak.

"What?" Logan asked, slightly confused at the reaction his two best friends were having to the name he had chosen. It was just a name! Yet Colin and Finn continued to stare at him slack jawed.

"Umm, Logan," Colin paused to collect his thoughts, "is there something you'd like to tell us?"

_Yes, _he thought, but the lie came easily. "No." He didn't have anything to say about the name though, other than the fact he hadn't been able to get his thoughts away from it since he saw that card. He didn't know the significance or even if there was a significance. He thought the name was perfect. It sounded perfect, it felt perfect and he felt perfect when he said it. It had an air of mystery, beauty, familiarity and fun about it. He was going to name his boat Ace, and why not? He loved poker.

"Reporter Girl." Finn practically breathed the two words that came out of his mouth.

-

"_I'm onto your routine you know…"_

_-_

_That little wrench! She thought she was something didn't she. There was no guarantee that she wouldn't print names in her article. An article on the Life and Death Brigade? That seriously blows. This wasn't going to go down well with the rest of the members, but there really was only one way to go about it._

"_What's up Logan?" Colin asked from his comfortable lounging position on the sofa._

"_We've got an Ace Reporter on our case folks." He said, the bitterness clearly evident in his voice._

-

'_Hey Ace. I've got a proposition for you.' He typed into his instant messenger program. He looked up to gauge her reaction; sure enough she was glancing around the room to identify the mystery person. He gave her his signature smirk as she glanced in his direction. He loved the way she blushed, just bringing the slightest shade of crimson to her cheeks as she turned back to the computer to respond to his message._

_-_

This time it wasn't like remembering a melody, but more like someone reminding him of something he has forgotten. Like when he was ten and about to go away to Summer camp,

"_Have you got your sunscreen, Logan?" the maid had asked, 10 year old Logan snapped his fingers in remembrance, his eyes lit up at the prospect of spending the Summer away from this cold house and with Colin. Little did he know he would meet Finn there too. "Thanks Margie, I knew I'd forgotten something!" he ran out of the room in search of the missing sunscreen._

She was Ace. He had named her Ace. There was no keeping up the charade any longer. This was major.

"You're remembering aren't you?" Finn asked, his mouth matching the other men in the room as it hung limply in shock.

Logan nodded his head slightly, he couldn't lie anymore. He had already given so much away. He had given them their hope.

A grin spread widely over Colin's face quickly and was soon mimicked by his Father and Finn.

"How much?" Mitchum asked in his best business voice, it looked like their father son chat was over. Honesty would have to be the best policy from now on.

"I remember asking her to the LDB event," he didn't even have to tell them who 'her' was, nor did they make him, "I remember running out of the room to find you two giggling like little girls and staring at her like a piece of meat. I think… I think I remember everything before that, but nothing after. Fiji is still a little vague, sand… girls… booze… pounding headache?" Logan finished, hoping that they would let the conversation slide and not delve into it any further, not pressure him to remember anything more.

"We've got to call Rory!" Finn cried, reaching for his phone.

"NO!" Logan shouted, a bit too urgently as three shocked faces stared at him in wonder.

"Why not?" Finn voiced the question on everyone's mind, his unopened phone in hand.

"If you tell her, she'll think there's hope. She'll think things will be able to go back to what they were before. I don't want to give her false hope. I don't want to be in a relationship, I feel like I've already lost all this time."

"Rory's smarter than that Logan. She understands you. She'll want to know she's not forgotten." Colin said with countering logic, Logan stood his ground, he was _not _about to tell Rory. He wasn't going to get any more involved in this than he already was. He wasn't going to lead her on until he was ready to lead.

"Baby brother! Oh, Logan!" Just at that moment Honor burst into the room and embraced her younger sibling in a rib crushing hug, well, it wasn't that tight, but with Logans ribs it had the same effect.

"Ow, Honor! I mean, I'm glad you care, but I already broke the ribs once."

Honor glared at him, "You. Are and idiot." Logan couldn't help but roll her eyes at this, "you jumped of a friggin cliff Logan! What were you thinking? Rory sounded completely devastated when I last spoke to her, she couldn't even tell me what was wrong with you without bursting into hysterics. I was lucky she managed to tell me you were alive!"

The four males in the room stared at her slack jawed, this was one person who didn't know everything. They had assumed Rory had told her everything, then again, Honor had been on a plane for the pat 16 hours. Once again, they would have to be the bearers of bad news.

"Um… Honor… physically I'm going to be fine, in fact, I can go home in only two days time as long as I don't participate in any strenuous activities and continue to get better at the rate I currently am…"

"I'm sensing a but coming on…"

"I kind of don't remember anything from the last one and a half years." Logan said, not making eye contact with his beloved sister.

Honor collapsed next to Logan, sitting next to him on the hospital bed, causing Logan to be thankful that his privileged background had afforded him a slightly larger hospital bed. The shocked look on Honors face mirrored that of every other person he had told so far. It was just as hard to face every single time.

"But there is good news." Honor remained motionless, he was unsure wether she had really heard him. "I think I might be starting to get some of my memories back." Honor exhaled a deep breath and turned to face him again.

"You should probably minimise the gap between those two pieces of information baby brother." She gave him a wan smile before standing up again to join the rest of the visitors.

Mitchum glanced at his watch, "Look, I have to run. I'll tell Shira that you're ok, she's coming back from her spa trip tonight."

Logan watched his father turn and start to walk away before he gained the courage to ask the question he had been wondering ever since his father had showed up, "Dad," Mitchum stoped in his tracks and turned back around, "What made you come?"

"You're my son Logan…" he started, stopping when he saw Logans sceptical expression, "Fine, listen to this." Mitchum pulled his blackberry out of his suit coat and pressed a few buttons before a voicemail message started playing on loudspeaker.

"Mitchum Huntzberger?" Rorys voice came across, asking the rhetorical question, "It's Rory Gilmore. I just thought I'd call and remind you that Logan is lying in a hospital bed with a partially-collapsed lung and a whole host of other potentially life-threatening injuries. And I'm figuring a guy like you surrounded by nothing but a bunch of terrified sycophants might not have someone in his life with the guts to tell him what an incredibly-selfish, narcissistic ass he's being. So I thought I'd jump on in. Swallow your pride, get in your car and come down here and see your son, _now_!"

The fact that she hadn't mentioned the memory loss was evident to everyone. She was in denial when she left that message. She kicked ass, but she was in denial. Everyone in the room had to bite back a laugh when they heard her voice scolding the great Huntzberger, it was too good. Mitchum let out an unimpressed huff at the look on the younger generations faces before reclaiming his blackberry and making a hasty exit.

"I love that girl." Honor sighed, a small smile playing at her lips.

Finn had started giggling stupidly while Colin spoke, more to himself than anyone in the room, "I've never seen Gilmore crack it at anyone… besides Logan, of course. She's always so shy… polite… innocent." Then he too joined Finn in his giggles.

Maybe he hadn't been an idiot when it came to his choice of girlfriend, Logan had to admit, though the idea of choosing to have a girlfriend still sounded absurd to him.

"Shit." Honor said, suddenly sobering after her previous gleeful disposition, "Rory. Don't tell me you… oh. Well… oh. I really want to hit you right now Logan." She sounded disappointed. As if Logan wasn't feeling bad enough about the situation already.

"Why does everyone take her side? I mean, I'm the one with brain damage! I'm not going to mess with her."

"It's just… you screwed her around a lot Logan. She's never had the best luck with boys, she had two boyfriends before you and… five and a half, now six and a half break-ups. She's so sweet, everyone falls in love with her, but she's also so naïve, it leaves her in bad places a lot."

"How do you know so much?" Finn questioned, upset that Honors knowledge of the spunky brunette outdid his own.

"We had a lot of girl talk when she went shopping with me. Her life's a bit of a soap opera."

Colin counted off his fingers, "There was pick-up truck guy at the 'Yale Male' party as she calls it… there was Logan and the first fight, where he got all girly afterwards… and then the bridesmaid, which I'm guessing is the half because they were broken up for all of three hours and then… well..."

"Look… can we not talk about her?" Logan asked, not wanting to talk about any ones love life, let alone one that was supposedly his.

"Sorry mate." Finn said with a bit of a grin before Honors phone started ringing loudly.

"Lo?"

"…"

"No, sorry… Hello? This is Honor Huntzberger speaking."

"…"

"What do you want Mommy dearest?"

"…"

"What? But he's just-"

"…"

"Two days time, but he's supposed to-"

"…"

"Yes mother."

"…"

"No mother."

"…"

"I'll watch the attitude, but this is a really bad idea."

"…"

"Ugh! Why can't you just-"

"…"

Honor looked at her phone after the other person had obviously just hung up on her.

"What did mother shanghai you into?" Logan asked, unamused. His mother was always plotting and planning something or other, usually involving that draining Fallon girl who was supposedly 'made for him'. If his mother hadn't caught on after three years, he wasn't sure if there was any hope left.

"Uh… well, she wants you to drop by the club Friday afternoon…" Honor said, slightly hesitantly.

"WHAT? That's ridiculous! I'm only getting out Thursday!" Logan cried, completely stunned that his mother would be so cruel.

"According to her, 'one lunch will do Logan good; he must be yearning for some proper social company after all that time in that _dreadful_ hospital!'" Honor said in her most realistic Shira impersonation.

"Anyway out of this?" Logan asked, not thrilled with the idea.

"You could jump off a cliff." Honor joked in mock contemplation, "Look, stay at my place Thursday night. We'll go together."

Logan nodded, accepting his fate. Now he had solid evidence that there really was no saying no to Shira when it came to lunch at the club. He was extremely lucky he had been making a quick recovery.

-----

"But Grandma!" Rory whined into her phone.

"No Rory, you will not get out of this lunch. These friends of mine are important and recent circumstances mean that an urgent reconciliation is needed, you will not disappoint me!"

Rory sighed, "Will you at least tell me who I'm meeting?" Rory was not keen on being set up with a new match so soon after her recent break-up… if you could call it that.

"Oh! Rory, please excuse me… I have to rush. I'll see you Friday afternoon. Don't bother about Friday night dinner… I don't want to hassle you too much." She should have known better than to think that her grandmother would tell her which beau she was getting set up with. At least she didn't have to go to Friday night dinner. Always look on the bright side of life, right?

"Oh, sorry Love. Didn't realize you were still kicking around here." Finn had burst into the room carrying one of the boxes Rory had packed not four days earlier. "I'm just dropping off some stuff that Logan's done with. He's getting out Thursday, spending the night at Honors and coming here for Friday night… that alright?"

Rory sighed, she really wanted to stop her foot and throw a tantrum right now. "Sure, I'll call my mum, she'll be glad for an excuse to get out of Friday night dinner." Rory was so easy sometimes; she'd always be there, going out of her was to make everyone else happy and fit in with their plans.

"I'm so sorry, Love." Finn said, sounding completely sincere.

"Shit happens right?"

"Shit happens." Finn gave her a nod and put the box on her coffee table before leaving the apartment cold and lonely once more.

She pulled out her phone and dialed one on speed dial, the number was almost worn off with frequent use, frequent but needed use. "Mum? Change of plans. Can you come earlier? …"

She needed to start packing.

-----

"So, Logan." His psychiatrist started, "Tell me about the memories you have been getting back."

"Well," Logan began, already prejudiced against the psychiatrist for the mere fact that it wasn't his choice to be here in the first place. He was here for Honor. Personally he didn't want to think about the memory loss, let alone talk about it. "Bits come to me… like, when I see something related." Logan begun. He wasn't about to spill every detail to a man with a name tag reading 'Dr. Wilson' right off the bat.

"Is there any order to these memories?" Dr. Wilson asked.

"Yeah, chronological. It all just builds on itself." Real descriptive Logan. It all builds on itself? There wasn't really a good way to describe the feeling though, it was almost like he was living through those times in his life again, living another life in randomly separated clumps.

"How does it feel when you get a memory back?" That was reassuring, Dr. Wilson's' questions were even vaguer than Logans answers.

"The first time it was like… I knew deep down what I was trying to remember… like that feeling where you can't remember a word or name and can't get it out of your head until you work it out. The second time was pretty similar, though it was more like a déjà vu. I felt a bond with uh… what reminded me… and then eventually my friend said something that helped me make the connection and the memories rolled in as though I'd never lost them."

The doctor frowned a little before taking some notes. Why did he let Honor talk him into this?

-----

Rory rushed into the Club 15 minutes late where she was supposed to meet her Grandparents for lunch. It was raining outside and had been drizzling all day. She understood now how the rain could perfectly reflect someone's mood, washing everything away and leaving behind no evidence. It was gloomy, depressing, but she wasn't crying anymore. She hadn't cried in two days. It was the first sign of the funk leaving.

"Grandma, Grandpa!" Rory called out, spotting the familiar face at the club and walking over, "I'm so sorry I'm late. You see, I promised my mother that the next time I saw a 'honk if you're...' bumper sticker I'd honk, so then I'm driving along the highway and the guy in front of me has a 'honk if you love Michelle Branch' bumper sticker, really lacking creativity… and taste if you ask me, so, I was obliged to honk, as much as it killed me to do so. Well, anyway, there I was driving along and I reluctantly honked my horn and, what do you know, this Branch fan slowed right down! So I was stuck doing twenty behind a distasteful and uncreative bumper sticker sporting, but unsupporting car." Rory finished her rambling excuses and looked up from her grandmother to greet the rest of the table, her face paled. There seated at the table were the people whom she last wanted to spend her time with. "Shira, Elias," She nodded curtly to the obviously displeased twosome before turning to face the rest of the group, "Honor! It's great to see you again! Logan." She gave Honor a sincere smile, and Logan a slightly hesitant one before taking her seat next to Emily.

"Rory," her grandfather beamed, "How is Yale treating you?"

Rory blushed slightly, "Well I haven't been to _all _my classes lately… I've been a little bit preoccupied, but Paris has been dropping my work off like clockwork." Looking for an out from that awkward line of conversation, she turned to Honor, "So, tell me, how was the Honeymoon?"

"Cut off short because of this idiot." She flicked her thumb in Logans direction who turned his attention away from his sister and Rory and towards the club soda he was nursing.

"I'll have you know that Robert has some explaining to do." Rory said with a knowing roll of the eyes. She was good, holding back her emotions like this. Sure, Honor was easy to stay cheerful around, but she really wanted scream right now, if only she weren't so polite.

"Rory, really, don't gossip with Honor! This is hardly the time, the whole point of this Luncheon is to clear up any hard feelings between Shira and Elias… too bad Mitchum couldn't make it." Emily whispered urgently in her ear.

"I have nothing to say to those two Grandma. They are your friends, not mine. Honor, however, is my friend who I have not seen since her wedding. Now, if you'll excuse me." Honestly, her Grandmother was impossible. Did she honestly expect to repent the acquaintanceship (or lack of) between these two families after all that had passed between them? She had another think coming.

"Shira," Emily started, as though talking to her best friend and not the woman she had called 'a two bit gold digger' months prior. Rory had to hold back a snigger, along with Honor, this went unnoticed by most of the table other than the three youngest. "It's been too long, how is life treating you?"

"Well, the whole Logan thing was a bit of a shock," Shira sighed for a dramatic effect, "but we are all dealing with it. We're looking at the positives. It's a good chance for him to rectify any mistakes he may have made in the past."

Subtle dig number one. Rory tensed noticeably. Shira was not going to get away with that all lunch.

"Logans lucky to have such a supportive network of people who are there for him," Rory began with the sweetest smile she could muster, "All the people who cared for him really came through."

Shira's jaw clenched and Elias' grip tightened around his glass of scotch.

"Is Josh doing well?" Rory turned back to Honor, satisfied with her not-so-subtle dig.

"Oh, he's great." Honor beamed at her, "but a better question is, how are you going?"

Rory's smile faltered. "You know, I'm alright. I mean, the new Rob Schneider film was a real disappointment, but I'm recovering. Just taking it one day at a time." Rory smiled again, though her eyes read a completely different story.

Honor gave her a 'what-can-you-do' smile and turned towards her mother.

"So, how are things at the DAR?"

"Miserable! Carine's fundraiser was a complete disaster! Only half of the tickets sold! They had leftover salmon puffs for weeks!" Shira complained, this was the one topic that these women could talk about for hours.

"They need more original ideas," supplied Emily, "That's what made Rory's event such a success."

Logan looked at Rory amused, he raised his eyebrows and mouthed, 'you're in the DAR?'. Rory scowled at him and rolled her eyes.

"Yes, although the seating wasn't quite proper to begin with. Attention to detail is important. It was a good effort for someone who wants to _work_." Shira spat the last word and it took all of Rory's strength not to leap over the table and throttle her.

There was no way that Rory could jab back at that comment without insulting her grandmother too. Damn her.

"Excuse me." Rory said, standing up from the table. "I have to use the ladies room." She stormed off, not noticing that she was heading in the complete opposite direction of where the ladies room was actually located. Nor that Logan had excused himself as well to limp off after her.

"Rory." Logan called out as he found her pacing one of the more secluded hallways.

"I swear. If she starts up with that one more time I'm going to throttle her! My grandmother too! She didn't even tell me you guys would be here! I- I… completely infuriating!" Rory ranted as she continued to pace the room. Suddenly she stopped and stood still facing Logan, "You know what the worst part is, she continues to treat me like she did when I was dating you, but it's like some tabooed subject! No one will mention it around me incase I break down. Yet there is nothing else to talk about! You do everything with those people! They're your life, they're part of mine too… now I'm loosing them to just sympathetic looks and patronizing conversations. I can't stand it. We even had a civilized ending! I mean, I'm definitely not mad at you and I doubt you're mad at me!"

Logan started to feel uncomfortable. He didn't know what to say, he couldn't tell her it would be alright… he didn't know that. He didn't know her. Instinct took over and he wrapped the girl in his arms.

"Relax Ace, you'll pull it together."

Rory pulled back from his embrace in shock, "What did you call me?"

-----

_I am s__cared to write the next few chapters. Tell me what you think of the story so far, pretty please! Yes, I am mean. Cliffhanger!! Thanks for all the people who are making suggestions, I have nine chapters written so far, so although it's not really going to make a difference, it's fun to know what you think. Please keep reviewing, it really helps me keep writing when I'm going through a slow spell._

_PRESS GO! TO GAIN MY UNDYING LOVE!_


	4. Just Friends? Just Friends

_Chapter Four:__ Just Friends? Just Friends._

"_What did you call me?"_

"Umm… Ace." Logan cringed as he too stepped back from the embrace, his hands in his pockets and his eyes diverted in a nervous habit.

"I know that… but why?" Her voice was barely above a whisper and her skin a ghostly shade of white. Her eyes were clouded over with what appeared to be pain, memories… and if Logan wasn't mistaken, the dreaded hope.

"I started to remember things." Logan confessed, watching her lips curl upwards in the slightest, "It's all so surreal though, these memories coming back in clumps now and then… well, actually only twice… it's not like it's all coming back in one solid go like I would have thought- but I mean, who can predict these things? It's pretty much unknown territory where I am at the moment-"

"What do you remember?" She asked, her earlier anger dissipating as she interrupted his rant that showed no signs of halting. He was nervous about telling her this, she assumed she knew why.

"Umm… the last thing I remember before the hospital is, currently, going out with Finn and Colin after getting you to agree to the unknown conditions for your article." He looked like a child who had been caught with his hand in the cookie jar, guilty. She didn't want to make him linger in a conversation he found awkward. He had most likely been putting up with that since he woke up.

"How did you disappear from the desk? I mean, one second you were there and the next there's no sight of you in the whole newsroom! You were just… gone!" Sure, she successfully changed the subject, but she had to inwardly curse herself. This just sounded like she had the world's shortest attention span… not a far cry from the truth.

"Never played ding-dong-ditch, Ace?" Logan asked with a teasing smirk.

"My mum made me play once… but I went back to apologize once she was at work. She said that everyone has to play ding-dong-ditch before they graduate elementary school, I didn't want to but she said it was that or egging Taylor's car." Rory said with a wave of dismissal.

"You've never egged anything?" Logan asked, with a smirk more teasing that the last.

"No, I upped that one and deviled-egged a car… this time it was _my _suggestion and me and mum drove away making screeching noises when the jeep was too slow." She scowled at him slightly when he started to laugh at her.

"I'm not sure who's stranger Ace, you or you're mother."

"I'm not sure who is more condescending, you or Judy Dench." She gave him a playful scowl before turning on her heel and walking back to the main dining hall, Logan limping hot on her tail.

Logan pulled her aside before she could be spotted and made to rejoin the group, "Rory, I don't want you to get your hopes up just because I'm remembering things… I can't make any promises." He looked so serious, Rory couldn't help but give him a small, almost sympathetic smile.

"Relax Huntzberger, I don't plan on being a best man again anytime soon, but you've got to understand now, when you start getting your memories back, you can't pressure me into falling back into old habits… not until we're on the same page… it just, won't work." It burnt her to say that, but she knew it was true on the most part. She did feel hope. She never said she didn't.

Logan watched her politely take her seat back at the table slightly confused, she was right though, they wouldn't be on the same page.

-----

"Well, that was an interesting lunch." Logan said as he leant against his walking cane in the parking lot with Honor and Rory.

"Sorry guys, but I completely hate your mother." Rory scowled, still bitter after the judgmental 'Spanish inquisition' that Shira had given her.

"You seemed to have made quite an impression on my family Ace." Logan said with a laugh.

"The only time they were even vaguely nice to me was when I was on the stupid DAR!" Rory complained, trying to hold back a rant about how horrible the Huntzbergers are in front of their only children –who happened to be very amiable people… one whom she was particularly in favor of.

"I can't believe you're on the DAR." Honor laughed as Logan sniggered along with her.

"_Was _on the DAR. I just needed a job that was flexible enough with my community service."

Logans jaw dropped, "Community service? Like, volunteering or, I once killed a man?"

"Well, I think that if you killed someone you'd be getting a little more than 300 hours of community service over six months…" It never failed to surprise her when Logan didn't remember these things that he was so involved in. She had to wonder if she would ever get used to it.

"You were a bad influence on her Logan…" Honor said with mock disappointment, "She was so innocent!"

"Hey! I was not innocent!" Rory denied, feigning annoyance as they started walking slowly (so as to keep up with Logan) towards their vehicles, "I shoplifted once."

"Oh yeah?" Honor asked, "What?"

"Cornstarch." She looked at the ground in shame. She was still a Mary at heart.

"Why'd you steal cornstarch?" Logan laughed, oh yes, it was going to be all embarrassing stories about her, wasn't it.

"I was sixteen and my almost boyfriend at the time gave me my first kiss… I said thank you and ran away, I just forgot to pay ok!" Rory huffed as Logan and Honor almost doubled over in laughter. Logan felt his ribs contract, but not even that pain could stop his laughter at her embarrassment.

"Sixteen? Sweet sixteen and never been kissed?" Honor asked with a gaping jaw.

"And everyone at school called me Mary." Rory mumbled. As much as she would deny it, she enjoyed sharing these facts with Logan and Honor. Mostly because when Logan was laughing with her, he was enjoying his time with her, he was getting to know her. Like she knew him.

"Hey Logan," Rory started, "Why don't you come back to the apartment in my car, my boxes are all packed and my mum should be bringing a car around in," quick watch glance, "Two hours. What do you think?"

"Yeah, that sounds great. I wouldn't know how to get there, and Honor hasn't been there either. Thanks Ace." He smiled at her, but for once Rory didn't get lost in his smile, but rather noticed the kissy faces that Honor was making behind his back. Rory scowled at her before leading Logan in the direction of her car. For now the dismal weather did not reflect her mood. She was happy, no amount of rain could take that away.

-----

"So, this is it." Rory said, indicating to the apartment. That was definitely strange, this was Logans apartment and she was showing it off like it was her own.

"Wow… Henry!" Logan said, looking around the apartment and recognizing the imposing suit of armor.

"Well, I'll let you look around, my stuff is in the boxes over there… actually… you should probably lay down. You lay down. I have a call I need to make." Rory said, pointing sternly at the bed while Logan rolled his eyes.

"Lorelai Gilmore directive service, you call, I tell you where to go, how can I help you?"

"What if this was Grandma?" Rory asked, playfully scolding her mother.

"Then I would have followed through. So how was lunch with the lovely ladies at the club?"

"You mean lunch with grandma, grandpa, Honor, Logan, Shira and Elias?" Rory said with mock innocent curiosity.

"NO! The Huntzbergers?" Lorelai asked rhetorically, completely shocked that her mother would sink to such a low.

"I was shanghaied into their 'reconciliation luncheon'. It was ok though." Rory's confession lacked the bitterness her mother expected it to contain.

"Uh huh… ok? You went to Hell and back and you thought it was ok?"

"No, when you made me drive to Hell in the middle of a blizzard to pick you up because you wanted to be able to say 'I've been to Hell and back' and also to have proof that hell has 'frozen over' but the Jeep got bogged in and needed to get toed –hence the me picking you up, I was _not _ok with that." Rory countered, remembering her mothers outrageous adventure the previous winter.

"Eh, I've done way crazier. Anyways… I have a feeling that this okay-ness might have something to do with a certain blonde boy…"

"It might…"

"Like…?"

"Like, we talked, we agreed, he's perfect, he's here right now we're friends." Rory listed nonchalantly.

"Friends?" Lorelai asked suspiciously, "Aren't you like, crazy, head over heels, this might be '_The Ones_' about him?"

"Yeah."

"Ok, so, you're being friends with Logan, who is at the apartment with you, while you're still in love with him but won't make a move?"

"Yeah."

"And you went on about Hell for how long?"

"Mum!" Rory whined, she really wanted her mothers opinion on this, not to hear her mothers silly anecdotes for hours straight.

"Alright, alright. You know that episode of '_Sex and the City_' where they have the whole Love Addicts ordeal?" Lorelai questioned, knowing full well that Rory was up to scratch on her Miranda intake.

"Yeah… oh no!" Rory clued onto what her mother was talking about, "That's not it at all! I'm not like that! I'm not a love addict! I take time, I have relationships… I… I…"

"You never let go, honey. Once you love someone you never stop loving them, maybe you do need to let go, write a pro/con list, figure things out."

"Just because I have good taste in men doesn't mean that I'm a love addict!" Rory defended, she wasn't a love addict! Love addicts were like Romeo, head over heels in love with Rosaline one minute and killing himself over Juliet the next. She had only been in love two, maybe three times. Sure, she still loved Logan, but that was different… and she might have had a little something for Jess after the incident in Philly, but she stopped that pretty quickly! And Dean, well, she wasn't over Dean last summer. Was she over him now? She wasn't a love addict, she was a familiarity addict.

"Honey?" Lorelai questioned after a considerable silence.

"I'm not a love addict. I'm a familiarity addict."

Lorelai laughed, "But calling you my 'love addicted, love child' sounds so much cooler!"

"So, anyway, what's up with you?" Rory questioned, she hadn't spoken to her mum in a few days and she still needed processing time before walking back into the room with Logan and being 'friends'.

"Grandma bought me and Luke a house."

"WHAT?" Rory gasped, "We covered hell, love addicts and my luncheon before we got to _that _bombshell? Don't we already have a house? We don't want a new house do we? How long have you known? For once you spent time with your parents and didn't consider going Menendez on them?"

"Sorry. Yes. No. Two days. It's a beautiful house. If there are more kids in the future, it might not be bad to have that house… it's not too far from stars hollow and it is single handedly _the _nicest thing my grandparents have ever done for me. So, I guess that for the moment I'm giving the Menendez treatment a miss. It's like the pudding incident of 2001."

'"So…" Rory paused, unsure what was to come of the unspoken question, "You and Luke are ok again?"

Rory could feel her mothers beam over the phone, "We're great. Back on track after the wedding fiasco. Things are great. I'm great."

"That's great mum. You sound happy."

"I am. I'm really happy kid." Lorelai confirmed, her happiness infecting Rory who couldn't help but smile too. Things were great.

Rory grinned, "Just checking."

"Is the world coming to an end?" Lorelai questioned with a smile.

"Don't worry, you get the arc and I'll get the animals." They were always slightly dramatic.

"Goodie, we can play animal kingdom!"

"So you'll be here soon?"

"Hmm, maybe in around two hours… I wouldn't want to rush over considering…" Lorelai put on her pondering voice as she 'hmm'ed and 'ahh'ed for a while.

"See you soon mum!" Rory finished, rolling her eyes slightly, "OH! And a Michelle Branch bumper sticker made me fifteen minutes late for dinner at the club!" Rory added.

"Well it's better than listening to her music…" Lorelai countered.

"See you soon mum."

"Love you my favorite love child!"

"Love you too." Rory laughed a little before finally concluding her stalling session, "Bye!" Rory hung up the phone and smiled, taking in a deep breath. Everything seemed ok after a chat with her mother. Her mother was the one person she could always rely on. She was always there. Always helping. Always loving.

-----

Logan looked around the apartment, hearing murmurs of conversation and laughter in what appeared to be the only secluded room in the spacious studio apartment. He limped over to the window, supporting himself on various inanimate objects as he went. The view of old campus from the window was spectacular. He sat down on the bed in silent defeat, he had had a long day and could no longer put off the tiredness his body felt. He didn't like the feeling, complete alertness of the mind but exhaustion of the body, he was used to staying out a partying till three in the morning.

A picture on the bedside table caught his attention, it was the picture of him and Rory holding hands and jumping off the scaffolding. The rush of adrenaline he had felt then was like no other. Finn had come out of that day with a sprained wrist, he had come out with a major crush.

Logan almost jumped out of his skin when, after nearly two minutes he realized that he wasn't supposed to remember the jump, to remember giving her the letter, to remember Colin's many futile attempts to get Juliet to go out with him. Logan smiled. For once, for now, he was happy he remembered.

"Ok, now you stay there. My mother should be here in around two hours… she's not the most timely person… will you be ok here by yourself when I'm gone… what if you need to get something to eat, or go to the bathroom?" A slightly worried and panicked look took its place on her face as Logan was broken out of his thoughts, amused and annoyed by her antics.

"I'll be fine, Ace. I've given it all up, trust me, cold turkey." He held back a laugh as Rory glared at him.

"So, anyway, I figured that we could watch a movie and eat some junk food while we wait." Rory said, trying her best to ignore his indifferent attitude.

"Sounds good to me Ace." Logan said with a smirk as he watched her rush around the kitchen, grabbing a bag of chips, M&Ms, lolly snakes and some old Chinese takeout from the fridge. It was then Logan realized just how big a part of his life this girl was. There was no way he would have all that food had he lived alone. He brushed the thought aside.

"Old Chinese?" Logan asked, not quite sure if he was up for the mystery meat.

"I am going to introduce you to the things you love, but wouldn't have tried yet," Rory said as she started heating up the leftovers. "For example, Chinese and The Breakfast Club are on today's menu."

"Isn't The Breakfast Club the one with Molly what's- her-face, you know, the 80's chick flick girl?"

"Yes, Molly Ringwald. She was in _'Pretty in Pink'_, '_Sixteen Candles'_, and _'The Breakfast Club'_, then some tragic horror film in the early nineties. After that she slipped of the radar… got married to some not-so-nice guy before having a kid with a nice guy… but I don't think they're married."

"You ask a simple question…"

Rory rolled her eyes and removed the takeout boxes from the microwave and put them on trays obviously used for having breakfast in bed. She dumped the packets of food on the bed and went to flip through the DVDs, all while Logan watched her, frowning slightly.

"I'm not watching it."

"Yes you are." Rory gave him her best 'don't-mess-with-me' face but he didn't cave.

"No way, it's a girls film!"

"I got you to watch in last summer and you _loved _it. It's not a girls film!" Rory protested, the truth was that Logan had never watched 'The Breakfast Club', not from lack of trying, but rather from his general stubbornness. She was going to take advantage of his predicament, however, as a chance for him to try something new, something different. Very possibly something bad for him.

Logan thought about it for a minute before caving, "Alright. I'll watch it. But what's with all the food?"

"Umm… we're watching a movie." Rory said, it being the most obvious thing in the world.

"But we just had lunch!" Logan pointed out, much to the displeasure of Rory.

"You, my friend, are a disappointment. Now sit back, watch the movie and eat the food… but try not to pull a Finn and keep the food in your mouth."

"You jump I jump Jack." He said with a smirk as he watched Rorys mouth gape open in surprise.

"Don't try and make me forget about the movie mister." Rory scolded much to the blondes surprise. No one, _no one_ had just given a memory a rest so far without the twenty questions that followed.

-----

"So… what did you think?" Rory asked, turning to Logan as the credits started rolling.

Logan, who was faking sleep sat up slightly and ignoring the pain in his ribs pretended to have just woken up, "Huh? What? Oh! Sorry, what did I miss?"

"Logan!" Rory scolded, "Don't mock! What did you think?"

Logan sighed in resignation, "It was alright, I wouldn't go as far as to call it my favorite though." He said with a shake of his head.

"Well, it was the first time you've seen it." Rory admitted with a sly grin.

"What?" Logan asked, slightly dumfounded.

"I lied. I've never been able to get you to watch it so I decided to, what do they say, 'always look on the bright side of life' and con you into this." She said as Logans eyes widened, much like her smile.

"You lied!"

"Yes."

"To me? Poor innocent me! Poor bedridden me!" Logan whined in mock agony.

"Innocent? You?" Rory laughed, "And it's about time you were bedridden. I've had you dragging me bar hopping when you had a 102 degree fever!"

Logan smirked at her, just imagining her bar hopping almost made him laugh.

"Yes, I know. Me bar hopping right?" She said, reading his mind, "The things you made me do! Anyway, I'll make the movie up to you."

Logan smirked and raised his eyebrows, earning him a slight slap on the shoulder, "Ow! Ok, ok, how will you make it up to me?"

"You should talk to Colin about how much money Finn and Robert owe you after your poker games." Rory said, smiling as Logans eyes lit up.

"Finn and Robert? I beat Finn _and _Robert at Poker?" Logan asked with a smile.

"Yes… and speaking of Robert, what is your opinion of him? Your honest opinion?" Rory asked, hiding the mischievous smirk that threatened to play on her lips.

"He's alright, a little bit of an ass… but he's Colins friend so what can you do right?" Logan said with a nonchalant shrug.

"And here I thought I was special." Rory pouted causing Logan to send her a confused stare, "Anyways, I should call mommy dearest and ask her where she is." Rory pulled herself off the bed and started her search for the phone.

He had to admit it, she was nice. She was perfect, she was the perfect girlfriend. He, however, was so far from the perfect boyfriend. He would have his memories –eventually. That would be enough. That part of his life was over.

Rory dialed the familiar number into the land line and waited for it to connect.

She could not recall a word of the conversation she had that day. Only that her entire life crashed down with the phone that slipped from her hands.

-----

_Why do I leave you with suck cliffhangers? Because it's fun and… well… it's fun. __This plot is actually stressing me out to write, perhaps it's because I'm a shitty writer and can't get my ideas across. I'm a bit savans like that, having to write my ideas down as soon as I get them. I have notebooks full of ideas. However, supposedly the left side of my brain is still functioning perfectly normally._

_Please, pretty please,__ with a review on top, press GO! And make me smile!_


	5. Waking Lorelai Gilmore

_Chapter Five: Waking Lorelai Gilmore_

Hours. Three hours. Three hours of cold, hard, suffocating silence. Silence so loud that nothing can be heard above the screaming, agonizing pain that is so goddamned painful it has to be real. The screaming has to be real. Otherwise you have to admit that the all self absorbing pain you are feeling is a creation of your own, your own reality of life as you know it ending. Of losing everything. She lost everything with that phone call. Time stood still and raced past in a confusing juxtaposition as she chocked over the words that had been echoed in her ears by the firm male voice. She was gone. Her friend, her mother, her lifeline. Dead. The rain, the misogynistic, gender-selective truck and the stupid, good for nothing, speeder.

Logan watched as the phone slipped from Rorys hand and clashed on the ground. Rorys face contorted in pain and confusion as she too fell to the ground and sat there. Just sat there. He couldn't tell if she was breathing, thinking, or even recognizing.

"Rory?" He called, trying to get off the bed and run to her, "Rory?" He wrapped her up in his arms and pulled her onto the bed, she didn't even look at him. She was dead weight. If it wasn't for the slow beating pulse in her veins she might have been dead. The occasional breaths she took were short, raspy and scarce. Her eyes, misted over and unfocused were searching, grasping for something in the darkness she felt, the brink of all despair, lack of knowledge, and a lifeless life, deathless death.

He held her in his arms for three whole hours, waiting, watching, wondering. He didn't notice his own tears that traveled down his face as he absorbed the sight before him. He didn't hold her out of obligation. He held her because he cared.

The loud banging of the door woke him from his trance of confusion, sympathy and pain. He hobbled over to the door, expecting to find Rorys mother, someone who would be able to help her, fix the shell of a person. Instead he found a young blonde girl around Rorys age with tear stained cheeks.

"Where is she?" She demanded, her voice croaky. Logan pointed towards the bed and the girl pushed past him to make her way over to Rory.

Paris embraced Rory in her arms, sobbing silently into Rorys hair. Rory inhaled one desperate, life giving breath and broke down into screaming, painful raspy sobs with her tearful friend. The two held each other, comforting their own and the others misery, all night. Eventually collapsing in exhausted despair and sleeping a tear stained, restless, unconscious sleep. They were the definition of oxymoron. They were everything and nothing, the emotions running through them too much to contain. Too much to think about. All Logan could do was watch, helpless and unknowing. Subconsciously he knew. He knew that something had happened to Rorys mother. It was the only explanation.

Lorelai Gilmore was dead.

Paris was the first to wake up. She wiped the corners of her slightly watery eyes and held back a strangled sob. Lorelai Gilmore had been her surrogate mother, she had been the one person that Paris had been able to talk to. Now not only had she lost a mother figure, but her best friend would be dying along with her. The complete despair she would be feeling is indescribable, unthinkable, unimaginable. Paris stood up from the bed, feeling vulnerable for once, unable to hold the strong shield she carried everywhere. The tough façade was running low.

"Oh. Hey." Paris whispered when she saw Logan standing in the kitchen, staring absent mindedly at the brunette girl laying silently on the bed.

"What happened?" Logan asked, his voice concerned, a feeling his eyes mimicked truthfully.

"Her… her mother just… she just.. d-d…" the words came out strangled, not with sobs but with sheer inability to speak, to form the words she dreaded hearing for the second time, ever since she had called Lorelais cell phone to find out where they were, when she should be expecting them and the stiff male voice of a police officer had informed her of the fatal car accident that had occurred not three hours earlier. Her thoughts had instantly run to Rory and she did not hesitate, nor think, before running to the aid of her best friend.

Logan looked at the glass of juice in his hand and remained silent. He felt sorry for the girl who had become his friend. He couldn't imagine that feeling of loss, from what he gathered her and her mother were close, closer than close. It must have been like him losing Finn and Colin, he wouldn't know what to do anymore. Who he was. Rorys life was something Shakespeare could turn into a really great play right about now.

"I'm going to take her back to my place. Thanks for looking after her." Paris said with a wan smile before turning to find Rory sitting up on the bed and writhing in panicked pain.

Rory awoke the next morning to an empty bed, dehydrated and her body searing with emotional pain. She had no more tears to cry and so the pain she felt was left with little outlet but the silent screams her mouth tried to let escape. She had just awoken from the last night of solid sleep she would experience in a long time.

"Rory!" Paris called as she rushed over to the bed.

"She's… she's!" Rory began through strangled breaths.

"Shhh." Paris soothed, "Come on… We'll go home."

"Stars Hollow?" Rory questioned, her insides feeling like they were about to explode.

"Yeah, wherever you want."

Logan watched as Rory was lead out of his apartment. She looked broken, dead, lifeless.

-----

Stars Hollow was not as soothing as Paris had previously anticipated. Everywhere she went, which wasn't very far, she was faced with the pitiful stares and sad faces, a steady reminder of the pain. The normally warm walls of their home were no longer warm, but cold and empty, full of reminders of happier days, a time when life was worth living.

"Hey Rory, Paris." Lane said, her eyes were red from a night of crying as she approached her silent friend and the blonde girl she had met briefly on occasion.

Rory looked at her and gave her a wan smile of recognition before turning back to the photos on the mantle piece.

"Hey Lane." Paris said sadly and mimicked Rorys previous action.

Lane looked on with them, all three remembering the woman that had been there for them when things got difficult, the woman who had laughed with them, mocked with them and on the rare occasion cried with them.

Rorys cell phone broke the companionable silence, Paris walked over to the table to answer the phone for the umpteenth time that day, Rory had not said a word since the morning, acknowledging people with her sad eyes and the eyes alone.

"Rory Gilmore's phone."

"Who is this? Where's Rory?" The voice of Emily Gilmore rang over the line, her voice raspy as though she had been crying for hours.

"Rory's… Rory can't talk right now. This is her friend Paris." Paris answered dutifully.

"This is her grandmother. We- We really need her here." She put on a brave voice. Emily had been distraught ever since she had received the fateful phone call, she had driven over to the hospital where they were keeping the body to identify it. Though the resemblance to her daughter was remarkable, it wasn't Lorelai. The light in her eyes was gone, the smile was gone. She was cold and empty. Emily refused to remember her daughter that way, her daughter wasn't a cold body. The funeral was to be in two weeks.

Paris jotted down the address, gave her condolences and hung up the phone, just like many a phone call before. "Your grandmother wants you in Hartford." Paris said, putting a hand on Rorys shoulder.

Rory nodded her head solemnly in agreement and started to work towards the car.

Paris shrugged her shoulders towards Lane. They had a silent, but mutual agreement; they were going to help Rory. Everyone was there for her. Lane had postponed her honeymoon, Paris had taken some time off school and they were her support network. Her safety net. Her temporary Lorelais.

-----

"Oh Rory! You're here!" Emily gushed, embracing her granddaughter as soon as they entered the door. Emily was still in her dressing robe, Richard nowhere in sight. "Richard is locked away in the study, not coming out for anything. The funeral arranger is here… It's all so… so…" Emily gave a stiff sob before turning her back on the group and rushing in the direction of the dining room, expecting them to follow.

In the dining room was a lady dressed in black with all sorts of funeral planning spread all over the table. All three girls felt tears burning in their eyes at the sight. Rory inhaled shallowly, the two friends beside her being her only source of comfort, and took a seat at the table across from her grandmother. Thankful for her two friends who dutifully took their seats by her side, never leaving her alone for a second, she was eternally grateful.

"So, Emily, I know you were thinking about having white roses, but if you also want a white coffin then the white roses would blend in, so red might be a better choice."

"Yes Miranda. That sounds lovely!" Emily said with a wan smile, she looked on the verge of tears, her hair undone and her make-up smudged. Emily would never see anyone in this state before.

"Have you put any thought into the procession song?" Miranda asked, jotting down notes on her notepad.

"No, just the standard tune will suffice." Emily said, watching sadly as the woman took notes.

"Where will she be buried… or cremated?"

"We're burying her with the family, we're kicking Aunt Cecile out." Emily paused to wipe her eyes as Miranda continued to take notes.

"No." Rory said suddenly, surprising everyone with her lack of silence. "We talked about funerals. No."

"You talked about funerals?" Emily asked with raised eyebrows.

"We talked about everything." Rory responded desperately, "She would have a pink coffin with Lorelai written on the front in rhinestones. Yellow daisies… she loves daisies… They would play _'Fame!'_ as her procession song, only because she thought _'Always look on the Bright Side of Life'_ was too obvious and in-your-face. The service would take place at Stars Hollow Church, just like every other funeral. She would take the ceremonial walk around the town center, partly because she loved the town, partly because she wants to give people a reason to laugh a Kirk again. You can bury her with the rest of the family… I don't like you kicking out Aunt Cecile… but she wants to be buried there. She likes tradition. Not a funeral march… not roses… not white. It's not… it's not Lorelai." Rory finished her eyes brimming with tears, though her lips were smiling sadly at the memory of her mother.

"You're right." Emily whispered. "It's not Lorelai."

"So… Yellow daisies?" Miranda began. This was their last goodbye to Lorelai, and it would be a goodbye to Lorelai, not their imaginary daughter Barbara Hutton.

-----

"The funeral is going to be very Lorelai." Paris said as they were driving back through Stars Hollow.

"Stop!" Rory urged, "I need to talk to Luke!"

Paris obeyed and let Rory rush out of the car, she banged frantically on the door of Lukes, ignoring the closed sign in the window.

"Can't you read we're –Rory." Luke yelled as he ran down the stairs and into the diner. His eyes were bloodshot, upstairs could be heard strangled cries of pain. The two people stared at each other, registering the others misery, before embracing in a father-daughter like hug, tears streaming down their faces for what seemed like the millionth time.

"What's that noise?" Rory asked, referring to the strangled noise coming from upstairs.

"Paul Anka." Luke said sadly, and both were silent. Listening to the canines mourning for its lost owner. "I mean, I hate dogs… but Paul Anka isn't a dog, he's some sort of hybrid that's afraid of everything… peas, the letter Q, porch steps, watches, lint, people drinking, and he only eats his burgers rare plus. Not rare, not medium rare, but 'rare-plus'. And as if that isn't enough, he has to eat that burger alone, in the dark in his favorite yellow doggy bowl that he picked out – dogs are colour blind! Then he can't go to sleep until he's had his broccoli or done something weird with shoes."

"Did you give him his sugar toe?" Rory asked meekly, trying to lighten the conversation.

Luke sighed, "Umm… would you like some coffee? On the house."

"No… I… no." For the first time in her entire life, coffee seemed unappealing. It seemed too painful, there were too many memories associated. "The funeral is in a week. Next Saturday. It's going to be here. In Stars Hollow." Both just looked at each other, both in understanding. They had both lost the most important person in their lives. The entire town was in mourning.

"Thank you Luke." Rory said, once they had broken apart and the sobbing had subsided.

"For what?"

"For everything. She was happy. Perfect. Thank you."

-----

Logan leaned across the bed to reach the ringing phone, he had been on bed rest since Paris and Rory had left three days ago, only getting up and hobbling around when absolutely needed. He grabbed the receiver and held it up to his ear.

"Hello?"

"Logan? It's your mother… Shira."

Logan could barely suppress a groan, "Oh really? Not my mother Margaret? What can I do for you?"

"Well, as you may have heard, Emily and Richard Gilmore's daughter, Lorelai Gilmore, passed away quite recently." Shira said, her voice alarmingly nonchalant.

"Yeah, I know… it's terrib-"

"Yes, yes… well, we received an invitation to drinks after the funeral at the Gilmore place. I would like you to attend."

Logan had all his excuses for these events sorted, "Mother, I'm on bed rest, I really can't move, and besides, I don't even know Lorelai… I'll have to pass this time."

"Really Logan, I don't think Lorelai plans on passing away again!"

"Mum!" Logan whined in a very childlike manner.

"Logan. Sometimes it's not about knowing who died, but who was left behind and being there to support those people in their time of need. Now the Gilmore family's a very respected family, not attending would be shocking for our reputation –especially after our wonderful reconciliation luncheon!" Shira scolded, her son was always doing something wrong, or avoiding some obligation.

"Wow mum. You almost sounded like you were being nice for a second. Look, when is it and I 'll see if I can go." Logan relented.

"It's on Saturday at 4:30pm, I'll send a driver to pick you up… and dress appropriately!"

"Alright, I'll see you then mommy dearest." Logan said sarcastically before hanging up. He hated being shanghaied into these boring society events, at least this time Rory would be there, though he didn't do too well last time she was depressed.

"Gah!" Logan cried as he threw the telephone onto the pillow next to him. Maybe he could do a Shira and shanghai his friends into coming along as well, never enter the lions den alone.

-----

The days leading up to the funeral were spent staring at the ceiling, night and day, a constant sleepless rest. Too exhausted to get up, too awake to sleep, to face the dreams. The pile of books and notes in her room grew considerably as Paris nobly continued to collect her class notes by whatever means she could. Rory couldn't even look at the notes, she just lay there, thinking, waiting for Saturday.

"Rory." Paris barged into the room, modest but pretty black dress in hand. "Shower, put this on, do your hair… we're leaving in an hour."

Rory gave her friend and thankful smile and stood up. Her feet felt like they were going to give out from under her, but dutifully she made her way to the shower, the water against her skin doing nothing to wash away the pain. Every step, movement, thought was still agony, though the tears had stopped coming a while ago. Was it better to cry? Or did that mean she was getting better? The pain wasn't going away, but her pain tolerance was building. She looked beautiful, suddenly that Kelly Clarkson song her and Lorelai had mocked endlessly was making perfect sense. She was a beautiful disaster.

They stood out the front of the chapel, just watching. That was the way that time passed now, in blurs of waiting.

"You ready?" Paris asked, motioning to the church.

"No."

Paris paused for a while, waiting for Rory to collect her thoughts, "How about now?"

Rory turned to her friend and inhaled deeply, putting on a brave smile, "Let's go."

The two began their climb up the steps to sit in the front of the small church, which was already starting to pack. Yellow daisies lined the front of the chapel, where the pink coffin sat, and true to her word, Lorelai was written across the top in Rhinestones. The top of the coffin was closed, Lorelai wouldn't be seen. The car crash hadn't done her well. Rory would never see her mother, but she didn't mind. She didn't want to remember her cold and empty, she wanted to remember her as the woman who took her to Atlantic City, the woman who spent the entire night with her when she got homesick at Yale.

"Rory!" Her grandmother bustled over to her, handkerchief in hand, "Rory, I'm going to do the eulogy, then afterwards there will be a small gathering at our house. You should attend. The funeral looks lovely."

"Grandma? Umm… can I… can I do the eulogy?" Rory asked timidly, she wasn't mad about the party her grandparents were giving, it was their way of saying goodbye, this here was for her mothers friends, Stars Hollow, the Hartford society need cocktails and business deals.

Her grandmother looked at her for a while, "You don't have anything written."

"I know what to say." She knew her mother well, she knew what achievements her mother would like to have honored.

"Ok." She hadn't expected her grandmother to be so obliging, but this was what she wanted to do. She wanted people to remember Lorelai the way she was, her grandmother wanted to remember Lorelai the only way she knew how. Surprisingly, Rory was completely ok with the act that would make Lorelai red with anger.

The priest stood up once the church was full, every seat was filled, people stood up the back, and everyone was there. A true testament to how loved Lorelai was in her life, how many people respected her, relied on her, cherished her and will now miss her.

"We are gathered here today to remember a most beloved member of our community, Lorelai Victoria Gilmore…" The reverend began, opening the ceremony, opening the wells of tears in the eyes of the community. "…now, her moth- daughter, Rory Gilmore, would like to come up and give the eulogy."

"Um, hi," Rory began, a mixture of nerves and grief, "You all knew my mother, and I'm sure she didn't hesitate to let you know what a good person she was, my mother loved her life, her work, her family, her friends… this town.

"An eulogy is supposed to commemorate someone's greatest achievements in their life. My mother doesn't want to be remembered for her charity work or her business sense, she wants to be remembered for her perfected hair twirl, throwing the best parties –most significantly my eighth birthday which was broken up by the police and the clown was arrested, her complete collection of Charlie's Angels plates… her talent of giving people funny nicknames and making almost anything into some sort of innuendo.

"All my life she's been there for me, guiding me in the right direction, having my back when I stumble or fall. But if there's one thing I do in life, I hope it's to be like her. She's my role model, my best friend. I know that she'd do anything for me, but I'd do twice as much for her.

"My mother wasn't an ordinary person." Rory paused to take a breath of composure, "My mum was my best friend. She wasn't your average Joe, she was completely crazy and everyone loved it for her… we'll miss you mum."

Rory reclaimed her seat next to Lane who embraced her immediately, letting Rory sob into her shoulder silently, until the music that was _'Fame!' _declared the end of the ceremony. The words had come to her naturally, this was her best friend, her light, her life, she would be lost without her and doubted she would ever stop missing her. Though, oddly enough, she was happier during the funeral than she had been all week. She finally got to say goodbye, let people remember Lorelai through the fun quirks and not _'she was dedicated to both her work and her family…'_. It had been perfect.

-----

"Are we going in?" Paris asked, as Rory, Lane and her stood outside the Gilmore house.

"I think we'll reenact _'The Little Match Girl'_ for a while longer yet." Rory responded, dreading the unsympathetic and insincere condolences from her grandparents' friends and colleagues.

"The funeral was great." Lane said, "Though, I thought that Lorelai had better taste in music."

"Well, it wasn't really the tune but the lyrics she wanted… I would have Hep Alien redo it… but a live band at a funeral would have been a bit OTT. Besides, you needed to be sitting there with me."

"Hep Alien?" Paris asked, their conversation for the first time since the dreaded news verging on content.

"My bands name." Lane informed.

Paris turned to Lane and raised her eyebrows, the two didn't get on very well, but they had Rory as their –possibly only- common ground.

"Let's go." Rory leant forward to press the doorbell, waiting for the maid to open the door and welcome them to the dreaded party.

One look around the party and all three girls expectations were immediately met, it was the complete opposite of the funeral, boring, dark, depressing –as un-Lorelai as you could get. Had Lorelai been there she would have been recommending ways to escape; _'If you can get a screwdriver the back of my parents wardrobe jimmies out…' _or _'If the large oak hasn't been trimmed yet you can always climb down off the second story balcony…' _numerous –but unnecessary, routes out of the Gilmore mansion. They were futile though, mobs of people wanted to share their condolences, what a load of bull.

"Ok, here goes nothing." Rory said, exhaling deeply as she threw herself into the mosh-pit of high society.

"_Oh, you must be Rory… we are so very sorry for your loss… never knew her personally but…"_This was going to be a long night…_  
_

"_We give our most sincere apologies… Richard insures our__ company and he always said…" _She should have known that her grandparents event would be full of people wanting to talk shop, as Emily had once said, they would walk over her dead body to get to more business talk, now they were walking all over Lorelais dead body. Enough with the bitter thoughts.

"_Rory dear… so sorry… loved the apple tarts." _That one was almost sincere.

"_Love, I'm so sorry, she had excellent genes, really… and the jeans were working for her too."_Finn! Rory grabbed the Australian in a rib shattering hug.

"Finn! It's so great to see you!" Rory said sincerely as she pulled back from the hug.

"See Colin, I always told you the ladies came flocking to me." Finn said, turning to his sweater clad friend.

"Colin!" Rory said enthusiastically as she embraced the second.

"If only you could keep them… _mate_." Colin teased, "We're sorry about your mum Reporter Girl."

Rory gave them one of the sad smiles she had been using on a regular basis these past few days, "She would have hated these parties…"

"Then lets go to the pool house! I'll grab the boys, you gather who you like and Finn will grab extravagant amounts of alcohol!" Colin declared, in an attempt to cheer up the girl he considered his friend.

"That sounds fantastic!" Rory said gratefully and they split up, each with their goals in mind, and trying to avoid the older generations insincere condolences on Rory's part. Rory finally found Lane and Paris, who were standing by the punch bowl, trying to look inconspicuous.

"I swear Rory, they're making me feel so small right about now!" Lane declared as Paris just stood by her scowling.

"What happened?"

Paris decided she would best tell the story and spoke up then, "She's in a huff because Mrs. Charles found out she was in a band and told her fabulous it was." Her voice was very dry and lacking humor as always.

"It wasn't what she said!" Lane defended, "It was how she said it!" Lane put on a tragic posh accent and began to mimic Mrs. Charles, "Oh, it's so _lovely _that you're playing music, not everyone can live the highlife, and it must be a very _charming _lifestyle. How dare she?" The last bit came out with a bitter twinge and no longer with the atrocious accent.

"Gah! I hate that!" Rory responded, before recalling her reason for being there, "Well, a few friends from Yale are getting away from this… gathering… and having our own sub-party. This is just too depressing."

"Lead the way." Lane said grumpily as Paris just nodded her head in acceptance.

The pool house contained the small number of eight when they arrived, Logan, Colin, Finn and Robert were present, along with a collection of people that she vaguely recognized but couldn't put face to name.

"Hey…" Rory said meekly.

"I think this calls for a toast!" Finn cheered!

"You just want to drink." Logan pointed out with a roll of the eyes.

"To Lorelai!" Finn raised the bottle of champagne he was holding, ignoring Logans comment, "For giving our reporter girl here those lovely genes!" he took a swig from the bottle before passing another bottle to Paris.

"To Lorelai," Paris repeated, "for letting me borrow her clothes." She took a sip of the liquid and shuddered, passing it along to Lane.

"To Lorelai, for running Mrs. Kim interference!" Lane took a sip of champagne and almost choked, her alcohol tolerance was almost nonexistent. Lane passed the bottle along to Rory who held it for a while, contemplating what to say about her mother.

"To Lorelai, for always having my back." Rory took a long gulp of the bubby liquid; she was going to forget, going to be numb. Just for tonight.

"Hear! Hear!" Lane cheered, feeling the same way about her role model, "She was there for me when I ran my hand through Rich Bloomenfelds hair and was so embarrassed I didn't think I could show my face at school ever again." Lane added, Lorelai had everyone's back.

"When Rory dropped out of Yale and she made the time to listen to me!" Paris added, Finn and Colin shared wide eyed glances with each other, that was something they would consider amazing.

"For not killing any of my boyfriends." Rory added, Lane laughed at this while Paris merely shook her head.

"That's like saying she's a great person because she didn't aim for world domination!" Paris protested.

"Except she would have wanted world domination, and she saved Logans life." Rory pointed out, feeling slightly light headed after having drunken at least two glasses out of the bottle she still held.

"She saved Logans life?" Colin asked, always up for a Logan-did-something-stupid story. "From what?"

"First my mums boyfriend… and then my dad. They caught us in the coat room… I mean… we still had our clothes on," Rory blushed furiously, "She held them back while Logan snuck out the back."

Finn and Colin burst into fits of giggles while Logans face looked blank, it didn't feel like he was hearing about something he did, but rather a story about someone else. It was an odd feeling of disassociation from ones body.

Lane, sensing Rorys discomfort, continued the previous conversation, "She kept me fed during flan week and tofu month, and she was always there to listen to my new CDs… and then borrow them…" Lane paused for a second, in realization, "I never got my XTC Apple Venus Volume II CD back!" She complained, Rory looked at her hands.

"Um… Lane." Rory winced as she felt Lanes eyes narrow on her. "Well, she wanted to be buried with all the good CDs."

The night was spent with more laughter, stories, tears, drunken reenactments of The Godfather and being dropped off in the early hours of the morning, completely toasted and in Lane's case, sick. Logans arm managed to make its way around Rory's shoulder at some point that night. For a while she felt like everything was ok.

Reality was brought on the next morning in the form of hangovers. Though saying goodbye was not as fulfilling as Rory anticipated. She wanted the weight to be let off her shoulders, to be free of the depressing burden, though not all the weights were gone, would they ever be?

-----

_This part here has become like my blog, anyway, depressing chapter. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry! I hope no one hate's it now but it had to happen._

_Thanks for all your reviews, sorry I haven't had time to get back to any of them personally –but they really made my day (and my nose doesn't grow at all…) I had just finished reading a completely depressing Trory that had me shell-shocked for two days straight(!!) and reading all of the reviews had me grinning and laughing like a crazy person. Keep 'em up because I'm scared that I'll read more depressing stories and need the laughter!_

_Not much of a cliffhanger here__… for once. You have no idea how many times I almost deleted all my work so as not to have Lorelai die, alas, unfortunately my horrid mind added that as part of the plot and there was no real way to work around it without it coming out as a mess. ROGAN interaction in the next chapter, I promise. I know there hasn't been a lot, but it's all building up. I have a plan and I'm going to stick it out. Long chapter too. Gah, anyway, ciao! Remember to review!_

_Press GO! And tell me what you think. _

_Peace and Love!_


	6. Tall, Dark & Handsome

_Chapter__ Six: Tall Dark & Handsome_

It had been three weeks since the funeral, since the sub-party, since the hangover that felt more like death itself. Rory had immediately thrown herself back into school, she had missed so much time already that she needed to catch up, that was all alright, until her assigned reading and textbooks had become frayed with over use. She was working herself to the bone, everyone could see it, but nobody dared mention anything.

"No, you go in! It was your idea!" Rosemary pleaded with Juliet in hushed tones outside the Yale Daily News office, Rory practically lived there now, it was the one place they could rely on finding her. Previously it would have been at a coffee cart somewhere on campus, but she seemed to have quit the habit.

"Fine! I'll talk to her, but you're coming with me!" The two girls walked cautiously into the bustling newsroom and over to the editors desk where a petite body was hunched over and scrawling madly, her long brown hair being furiously brushed out of her face when it swung too low.

"Rory?" Juliet asked, causing the girl to jump.

"Oh. Hey guys, I'm kind of busy, what's up?" She had always been busy, in a rush, or running late. Whenever someone saw her in-between classes she had not stopped to talk for more than thirty seconds. Not even with Finns persuasion techniques.

"Ok, well you know how I told you about my boyfriend, Mr. Tall Dark and Handsome?" She barely paused for an answer, fearing that she would be brushed aside by the pasty brunette, "Well, we've been going out for two whole months now, and I thought that it was about time to introduce him to my beloved friends, so, you just _have _to come with us to The Rich Mans Shoe tomorrow night! I won't accept no for an answer!"

"I would love to but I have so much work to catch up on…"

"Rory darling," Rosemary said, her time spent with Finn causing her to use endearments of her own, "tell me, how long has it been since you were ahead of your work?"

"Well…I have beencalled Catch-up girl… not Ketchup girl though, I'm more of a mustard girl when it comes to condiments. Oh! But if you're eating chips, you have to have a salt and pepper dip! It's the best! And you really didn't need to know all that did you?" Rory said, blushing slightly and eager to continue her work.

"My metabolism simply doesn't accept food so… no, guess I didn't need to know. My metabolism does, however, accept drinks, especially with two month boyfriend and friends! So, will you come?" Juliet would get on her hands and knees and beg if the need arose. She wasn't going to leave empty handed.

Rory sighed, defeated, "Fine, I'll come. But, I reserve the right to leave whenever I want and not get stuck in some bar at two in the morning playing designated driver."

"Deal!" Juliet squealed excitedly, "I really can't wait for you to meet him! Oh! I have to tell the lads you're coming!" Juliet rushed out of the room, a slight bounce in her step, most likely from excitement.

"What's his name anyway?" Rory asked Rosemary, who was rolling her eyes at her happy friend.

She shrugged nonchalantly, "I don't know, Forest something? Something Forest? Something to do with trees."

Rory laughed slightly, "'Run Forest, Run."

"Yeah… maybe that's it." Rosemary said contemplatively.

"No, I mean, run, before Juliet realizes that it's impossible to do that much jumping around with her diet and collapses of exhaustion."

"Oh right!" Rosemary ran out of the room after her bubbly friend, leaving Rory alone once more with her layout. Perhaps if she rearranged it one more time…

-----

"So, have you got a date for tomorrow night?" Colin asked as he shoved a handful of cheetos into his mouth and continued to stare at the TV screen in Logans apartment.

"I don't know," Logan said, sitting down next to Colin on the couch, "I think I might take it as it comes, what about you?"

"I don't know either… I don't know why we have to go along to meet Juliet's flavour of the week!"

"Supposedly they've been dating for two months now." Logan said with a slight shrug. Two months was a lifelong commitment when it came to Juliet who went through as many guys as them girls, though she always said that the new boyfriend was 'the one'. She never dated multiple people.

"I think it's all because of Reporter Girl." As soon as Colin had said those words Logan had turned to face him fully.

"Where did you get that from?" Logan asked, having only seen Rory once since the drunken night after her mothers funeral, but their one meeting had been uneventful, Rory had been in a rush to get to her Political History class and hadn't much time to talk.

"Juliet has been really stressed about her, she's stopped drinking coffee, she's stick thin, and she's always rushing to this class, or to the newspaper. She's working non-stop. It's crazy."

Logan had nothing to say in response, he didn't know what had been going on with Rory, if anything he had been avoiding her. The memories coming back to him were bringing with them emotions, when he was in the hospital it was easy to say he didn't care, that he could just go on with his old habits, but as he started to know the girl she brought with her the guilt of what was technically not his fault. Needless to say, he never called the blonde nurse back.

-----

Rory stood in her bathrobe, staring at the clothes she had spread out over her bed. She had no idea what to wear.

"Rory, you're leaving soon right? Because I'm going out with Doyle soon and if you haven't left yet you need to set our dog recording up –nice look."

"I don't know what to wear." Rory said simply.

"Clothes would be nice." Paris looked at Rory in her robe with the blatant expression so often associated with Paris Gellar.

"She used to help me." Rory said quietly, her eyes still on the bed.

"Oh." Was all Paris could think to say immediately, "What did he like when you were together?"

"What? I'm not dressing for Logan!" Rory defended adamantly.

"So you don't want Logan to fall over himself when he sees you?" Paris asked, she raised her eyebrows and turned, shutting the bedroom door on her way out.

Rory sighed; she would be wearing her tight jeans and red pullover that night. She was pathetic. The really sad thing was that no matter how much she told herself that she was going to meet the new boyfriend, that she was over Logan and that she honestly didn't want to go out, the truth was that she was dying to go, just to see Logan, and it wasn't even guaranteed that he would be coming.

-----

Rory approached the table full of people, she averted her eyes from Logan and instead looked at Finn, who was talking suspiciously with who she guessed was TDH, she could only see the back of his head as Finn was insistent on holding his full attention.

"I swear I've seen you somewhere before!" Finn proclaimed, "You do TV?"

Rory decided to interrupt the conversation, feeling sorry for the poor guy who was getting monopolized by Finn, "Hi…" She said meekly, causing the table of people to turn and face her. The brunette turned and she was oblivious to the cheerful greetings of her friends, she almost choked on her spit and was certain that she took a visible step back. "Dean?!" She spluttered, once her voice was regained.

"Rory?" The guy said, clearly just as surprised, "That's reporter girl?"

"You two know each other?" Finn asked, "Is that where I know you from."

"Um," Rory began, not sure how to start the conversation as she took the empty seat next to Logan, "You saw Dean at the 'Yale Male' part my grandparents threw."

"Really… you're parents were Yalies?" Colin asked surprised.

"Dean." Logan whispered, snapping his fingers, it was like a light bulb had gone off in his head. He had been invited to a Party thrown by the Gilmore family, rescued a trapped Rory and started a sub party… only to be downed when Rory got dumped by her boyfriend in front of twenty odd guys. He had found her getting dumped sickenly relieving, "You're Dean!" he said again with more assertion.

"Um, yeah… I introduced myself earlier…" Dean said, not quite catching on and feeling completely uncomfortable, venerable and awkward.

"I remember you." Logan said, the cold edge in his voice making both Dean and Rory uncomfortable.

"It was a long time ago…" Rory said, trying to soothe Logan, but to Logan it was just the other day.

"So, you say you've been working in construction?" Logan said, pulling an Emily with his digs.

"Um, yeah." Dean said awkwardly, "I was restoring Juliets roof when we met." Dean supplied.

"Ah, she pulled a Miss Patty?" Rory said with a smile, trying to lighten the mood.

Dean smiled, relieved that Rory was not going to make this any more difficult than it already was, "Yeah, something like that."

"How do you two know each other?" Juliet asked, bringing forth the inevitable.

"Uh, we dated a few times back in high school…" Rory said evasively, not wanting to divulge into the whole college student and the divorcee saga, which she knew would interest Juliet and Rosemary immensely.

"Small world!" Finn said cheerfully, oblivious to the tension in the air.

"So, last time I saw you, you were driving away in a pickup truck, what's changed since then?" Logan said with mock sweetness. Dean paled, Juliet and Rosemary looked confused, realization dawned on both Colin and Finn while Rory whipped Logan out of his chair and dragged him out the front to talk.

"What is wrong with you?" She screeched at him.

"Nothing, I'm just making conversation!" Logan defended.

"You're such an ass Logan! You were an ass to Marty, an ass to Jess and now you're being an ass to Dean! What's your problem?"

"Look, I can't tell you about those other times with Margarita Marty and whoever Jess is, but he broke up with you in front of all those people, you once said that you don't like it when people hurt your friends, I'm the same way." Logan defended again.

"It was a long time ago, Logan!" she scolded, though her resolve was crumbling, he looked too cute, too sincere.

"To me it was only yesterday."

She kissed him, he fell back in surprise before he too stepped into the kiss, it was enticing, addictive. Her fingers skimmed over his back, pausing and teasing him in places that were so unknown to him, yet so thoroughly explored by her. He felt like a virgin while she read his body like a map. God, it felt good. He pulled her closer, his abdomen pressing against hers as she sucked lightly on his bottom lip, teasing the hem of his shirt with her fingers. She could taste his familiar taste; smell the cologne that she had so longed to smell for all this time. He moaned into her mouth as her fingers caressed the skin under his shirt and her tongue explored his mouth with such certainty. She snapped to her senses, she was supposed to be over him! She pulled away quickly and covered her mouth with her hands in surprise.

"Oh my god." She whispered, "oh… I –I… shouldn't have… mistake… so sorry." She murmured before running back into the pub and taking her previous seat. The group looked at her intrigued as she sat down and averted her eyes.

Logan walked in not long after, looking confused. "I… uh." He said, pointing at his seat which was blocked in by Rory.

"Oh, um, I'm sorry." She blushed furiously and stood up, letting him past. She exhaled the breath she had been subconsciouslyrestricting once he had past her and took her seat again. They were so close, not touching, but close enough to feel the heat of each others bodies. Teasingly close.

"My God." Finn said, breaking the curious silence, "I can feel the sexual tension from over here."

"What?" Rory asked, blushing again, "I –we… no, it's over. There's nothing… over."

"Sure it is." Juliet said with a smirk, holding back laughter as Logan glared at her.

"You two dated?" Dean asked, doing a shocking job at hiding his jealousy, though it was clear he was trying.

"Um yeah… we started dating in my second year." Rory supplied reluctantly.

"You weren't when we were… were you?" Dean asked, almost hesitantly.

"What! No! How can you think that! I would never do that Dean!" Rory said, obviously appalled by the situation.

"I don't know… with the whole Jess thing and then Lindsay…" Dean mumbled.

"That's you Dean… not me." Rory said bitterly, "I can't… I can't believe this." Rory rested her head in on one of her hands, her elbow propped up against the table as she massaged her temple with her thumb and forefinger.

Unnoticed by everyone, Colins face had been growing steadily redder. "Get out." He hissed at Dean, who almost jumped out of his seat in surprise.

"What?"

"Get out. You can't just get all jealous because Rory dated people after you and then call her a cheater and expect us to let it slide! Juliet is sitting right here while you go off on a jealous tangent! Are you insane? " Colin hissed angrily, "Get out."

Dean didn't hesitate to jump from his seat, grab his coat and rush out the door, scared of the angry mob that might follow.

"Um… I didn't expect that…" Juliet said quietly, staring at the closing door.

"Oh, Juliet! I'm so sorry!" Rory gushed sincerely, "He's really nice… you shouldn't let me bother you-"

"Really nice?" Juliet asked, "God, I've never seen him be such a jackass! No, I have more self respect than to let him walk all over me, plenty more fish in the sea as they say."

"Good for you Juliet." Colin said merrily before adding, "And us."

"My mum was right." Rory sighed.

"About what, love." Finn asked, beer in hand, he was always up for a girl talk at this level of sobriety.

"That I can never actually loose a guy." Rory expanded, "They just… stick."

"It's because you're such a catch they don't want to let you go." Rosemary said, shrugging Finns arm off from around her shoulder as she tried to cheer up her friend. Encounters with ex' were rarely enjoyable.

The laugh Rory gave at that statement was bitter and unbelieving, in her opinion, she was the one that had so little self respect, she couldn't find any other fish in that wide expanse of ocean. She just let the old fish walk all over her... but who wanted to date a fish anyway?

-----

Rory threw herself on the couch exhausted. She hadn't expected so much drama, Finn getting so drunk that he started dancing wasn't too hard to believe, and she could deal with that part of the night, but Dean being TDH? As far as she knew Dean had been in four relationships, Chicago Beth, her, Lindsay and now Juliet. What were the chances of that? Out of all the people Juliet dated, she had only ever been introduced to three of them, all in all, the chances of what happened that night were extemely low. She just wasn't blessed with the best of luck these days.

She still felt bad about the whole ordeal, and who wouldn't? Even when Logan didn't remember being a boyfriend he pulled out the protective card. She had liked it. Liked that he cared. So she kissed him.

She pulled out her mobile phone and stared at it, just stared at it, for a good five minutes. She had no one to call. Lane was on her honeymoon now, Paris was out doing god knows what with Doyle, Logan wasn't an option, Juliet and Rosemary would jump straight into trying to get them back together, Finn was well and truly off his face, Colin would be chasing after an off his face Finn, and her mother, well, she couldn't call her mother anymore.

Rory put down her phone and dug through one of the bags slung carelessly over the side of the couch. She pulled out some notes from her Russian Literature class and began rummaging through them, adding the occasional analysis, underlining the occasional sentence. She was too busy to call anyone anyway.

She wanted someone to call again. She needed a new Fish. Someone to make her forget that she was still in love with the old one. I guess you could say she needed a rebound guy.

-----

"You two did something didn't you?" Colin demanded as soon as the door had closed, both he and Logan ignoring the drunken Finn who was singing at the top of his lungs and doing laps of the apartment in his intoxicated stagger.

"Yeah… she just… well, kissed me." Logan didn't bother to contain the small grin that had appeared on his face. His doctor had advised him not to consume any alcohol, so, naturally, he only had two glasses. But whether he would still be grinning like a fool without the relaxing buzz he felt wasn't very questionable, it was a good kiss.

"Shit Logan!" Colin pleaded, "Tell me you didn't!"

"Didn't what?"

"Kiss her back you idiot!" Colin had been the designated driver and was starting to feel the need for a drink now. They were already at Logans place, they could just crash there.

"I'm sorry, but I _am _a guy." He might have sounded more apologetic had he not continued to grin like the idiot Colin had deemed him.

"Fuck." Colin slumped down on the sofa, head in hands. He wished that Logan wouldn't be such a screw-up, but it was inevitable wasn't it? Logan had been so whipped with Rory, it was bleeding obvious that he'd get some of those feelings back.

"Colin. I'm a straight guy. If a girl like Rory kisses you like… like…"

"Like she'd been going at it with you for over a year?" Colin supplied darkly.

Logan paled at the realization. He had been an idiot. "What do you think she thinks?"

Colin sighed, at least Logan was getting the bigger picture now, "I'm not going to get into a girl talk with you man, but I do think that Rory will be feeling pretty embarrassed and shitty right now."

"It was a good kiss." Logan observed.

"I'm sure it was."

"If that's what it's like when you're a boyfriend… perhaps I'm not as much of an idiot as I though." Logan said with a laugh.

Colin glared at him, "Don't Logan. Screw with this one and Finn will have your balls."

"I was just kidding!" Logan defended, "It's too fucked up."

"Definitely." Colin agreed.

"So… when's the next poker night? Supposedly Robert owes me some money." Logan said, pleased that the change of subject had come.

"Yeah, three grand, Finn owes you some too… though that's for an entirely different reason." Colin said, turning to glare at the Australian who had tired himself out and was lying on the floor like a starfish.

"I'm not sure I want to know." Though the conversation steered clear of the opposite sex, Logan couldn't stop thinking about how messed up the situation was. He liked her, he would have thought about asking her out if it weren't so complicated. Even if things cleared up, even if he got his memory back, he wasn't sure what would happen. He couldn't do strings. He didn't like the idea of her with other guys. Sure, he hadn't been with any other girls, but his doctor had told him to steer clear of any strenuous activities. Question was, by the time he was given the all clear, would he want to?

* * *

_Ok, so I lost more than half my demographic with the previous chapter. I hope you like this one more. I tried not to portray too much wallowing in this chapter (think Rory's reaction to the Dean break-up in Season 1), but there will be more. I guarantee... unfortunatly for some. Just so you know, this story is catagorized angst/romance, I'm sorry to all the people that hate me now... I'm pretty sure it gets happier._

_So,_ _while my creative endeavors__ make me enemies, I ask that you review, console my fragile state with your muched loved (and occasionally extremely humorous or deep) reviews. I need something to reference in my little authors rants here! Ask me questions, spit on me, redeem your undying love at the checkout. I officially have nothing to say anymore and will stop before I start giving away the plot._

_Press GO! Or I might have to cry._


	7. Coffee

_Chapter __Seven: Coffee._

"Here we go. It's always work isn't it!" Paris said briskly as she saw Rory sitting on the couch with a collection of books around her. It was now two in the morning, she had been doing her best to distract herself from the thoughts buzzing through her brain; Dean, Logan, fish, loneliness.

"Huh?" Rory said, looking up and for the first time getting a glance at the time, "Oh, wow, I lost track of time. I'll just pack up and go to bed."

"I mean, it was all Doyle could talk about tonight! Internships this, opportunities that. Just because it's his last year at Yale doesn't mean he has to drag everyone else into it!" Paris, complained, ignoring Rory who tried in vain to stifle a yawn, it was amazing how quickly you could grow tired once your focus was lost.

"Where is Doyle anyway?" Rory asked, closing her binders and slipping them back into her book bag.

"I made him stay the night at a friends house. He was bugging me too much." Paris revealed, "I have to let him know who's boss. How was your night? You had to see Logan right, your drama is distracting. Go. Talk."

"Well thanks for the compassion Paris." Rory said sarcastically.

"You know what I mean. So? What happened?"

"Well, first off, the new boyfriend was none other than Dean Forrester." Rory started, she was expecting many interruptions from her friend and was not disappointed.

"-You mean Farmer boy? Prince Charming? Bag boy? Your Dean?"

"A few of his least preferred alias', but yes, that Dean. He's not my Dean though."

"He was for like, two and a half years."

"Off again, on again. Anyway, so he's there, and Logan decides that it's a great time to remember the night Dean broke up with me." Rory didn't bother to suppress the bitterness she felt.

"At the… 'Yale Male' shindig right?"

"Yeah that. So Logan gets all stand-offish towards Dean who is completely freaking out by this point, so is Juliet by the way. Anyway, I dragged Logan outside and we-" Rory hesitated for a moment, not sure what to say, "um, we talked." The last word came out more like a squeak. If only he had inherited her mothers lying abilities. 

"You talked?" Paris asked skeptically.

"Uh… yeah. That's all."

"Uh huh… and Bill Clinton just… talked… with his secretary."

"What! Gross! I just… we'll, he was being really cute and I couldn't help it!" She wanted to take back the words, but it was no use now.

"Were you safe?"

"No!" Rory wished the ground would just swallow her up, Paris couldn't be thinking what she thought she was thinking, "It wa-"

"Oh God! You weren't safe! The last thing we need is you dropping out of school to raise a little Huntzberger! I'll drive to the 24/7 pharmacist right now and get you a morning after pill –otherwise I heard that a whole packet of the regular pill does the trick!" Paris had already grabbed her car keys before Rory could stop her.

"No Paris! I wasn't saying 'No I wasn't safe', I was saying 'No I didn't need to be safe' because I didn't sleep with Logan! I only kissed him!"

"Well that's not exciting." Paris said, sounding slightly disappointed.

"Well if you're looking for a soap opera then watch some daytime TV!" 

"You, Rory Gilmore, are the most undersexed person I know." Paris said, sitting on the couch next to Rory and folding her arms across her chest, "Besides, I don't have time to watch 'Days of our Lives', so your life is the next best thing."

"But I kissed him!" Rory whined, slumping back moodily.

"I'm sure Logan has been kissed a lot Rory." Paris said in a mock condescending tone.

"That's the point! I'm not over him, and I'm just another girl who he hooked up with one night!"

"Rory, relax, you're not just some other girl that Logan hooked up with, the girls that Logan hooks up with do a little more than just kiss him…"

"Paris! You really suck at this cheering up thing!" Rory said, starting to grow aggravated.

"Well, you need to work out what to do."

"I think I'm going to try and find a rebound guy." Rory said determinedly.

"Ok then, let's go!" Paris said, standing up and grabbing her coat.

"What? I can't go now! It's past two in the morning, and I don't know about you, but I'd like my rebound guy to be human, and even though Spike and Angel are cute, I've had enough drama for my lifetime." Rory said, staying firmly seated, "Besides, I've got my resolution, I'm over it and will be able to last the night before I kick into action."

"Ok, so you're completely over Logan because you _think _you might _try _and find a rebound guy." Paris said, her own unique sarcasm dripping from every word.

"Ok, so maybe I'm not _completely _over Logan, but I'm getting there… and at least I have something, right? Now, unless I want to look like someone from a Tim Burton film when I do get around to going out and 'picking up', then I need to get some sleep now."

"Fine, you go be sleeping beauty, because if you didn't you might look like the rest of us and not friggin Elle McPherson!" Paris said grumpily.

"I don't look like Elle McPherson! She's blonde and spends _way_ too much time in her underwear!"

"Agh! It's too late to engage in verbal volleyball with you, I'm going to bed!" Paris announced.

"And she finally gets the idea." Rory mumbled to herself as she walked into her room and started getting ready for bed.

-----

"Whatcha reading?" Logan asked, taking a seat on the bench next to Rory. Rory jumped a little, startled by his sudden appearance, she had been sitting and reading in between her classes, it was a good way to pass time at Yale, her way of relaxing a bit –per Paris' orders of course.

"Oh, ah, _'The Secret Life of Bees'_" Rory announced, flashing him the cover.

Logan nodded slightly, "Want a coffee?" he asked, holding out one of the two cups he held for her.

"Um, no… I've stopped drinking them…" Rory said, giving him a faint smile, just being around him made her slightly nauseous with nerves.

"Diabetic?" he asked.

"No ju-"

"Too good for the Yale stuff?"

"No, it's not-"

"Broke?"

"No, but it would be free if you-"

"Pregnant?" 

"What! No! I-"

"Ok then, take a coffee, you know you want to." He waved the cup under her nose, letting the smooth aroma waft towards her. She inwardly groaned, it smelled so good, he was right, she did want to, she had wanted to for a while now. The initial distaste for the liquid had dispersed after the funeral, but she hadn't caved. She didn't want to cave she-

"Mmmm." She moaned, he eyes closed as fully absorbed the scent.

"You've given yourself up now. You want it. Drink." He passed her the coffee which she took with a reluctant smile. She brought the cup to her lips and took a slow sip.

Absence really did make the heart grow fonder, her eyes fluttered closed and she sighed, it was heaven. If the first sip of coffee in the day was good, then the first sip of coffee in a month really was heaven. Pure heaven. Logan watched as her whole body relaxed into the flavor, he felt like he was intruding on something private, a reunion between two best friends… or lovers by the look on her face.

"You two want a room?" He asked her with a smirk, holding back laughter as her eyes widened in alarm and a thick blush rose in her cheeks.

"This coffee and I," Rory said, pointing between her and the coffee and trying to ignore his previous coffee as best she could, "are soul mates. It just took us a while to work it out."

"Well I'm glad to be of service." Logan laughed, "So, you like the book?"

"Yeah! It's great. It's not frustrating like some books, so it's a nice read. She doesn't run upstairs." Rory said thoughtfully, not noticing the confused look Logan was giving her.

"Run up stairs?" He asked with raised eyebrows.

"Yeah, like, you know in those cheesy horror films how the characters always run upstairs and you just want to yell at them not to, because you know they're setting themselves up?" She paused for him to acknowledge understanding, "Yeah, well she doesn't do stupid things that you wouldn't do; everything seems right at the time, natural –at least, so far." Rory explained.

"Ah, so she doesn't get trapped upstairs." Logan agreed, nodding his head in comprehension.

"Exactly." Rory said with a smile.

"Would you recommend it to me?" Logan asked, deciding to divulge into small talk before bringing up the inevitable.

Rory laughed, "And risk your masculinity? I don't think so."

"At least you care." Logan said with a smirk before realizing the depth of those for words, "That kiss-"

"Was a mistake." Rory concluded.

"Maybe, well… yeah… but I need to tell you this. I like you, and I don't want you to forget about me."

Rory stared at him with wide eyes, not quite sure if she had understood him, she restrained her anger and spoke as calmly as possible, "So, you want me to wait around thinking about you in some kind of convent while you get your shit together?" She was hopeless, that definitely sounded bitter.

"No!" Logan ran a hand through his purposefully mussed up hair in frustration, "I mean, I don't want to forget about me, because I'm starting to think that maybe I wasn't a _complete_ idiot doing whatever I did, and incase I don't remember, I don't want it to be all gone… and if I do… I need to be able to tell someone. You get me. It freaks me out, but it's just… the truth." He looked so venerable; she couldn't help but chuckle slightly at the sight.

"Don't worry Logan, I'm not about to forget you." Rory laughed.

Logan stood up, dusting his pants straight, "And for the record, you're a good kisser." He smirked as the colour rose in her cheeks, before turning to walk away.

Her voice stopped him after a few steps, "For the record, you _are_ a complete idiot."

She didn't let him get away with anything, he loved it. Shaking his head slightly he continued walking away, raising his hand over his shoulder in a backwards wave of surrender. As he walked away, one of the benches in the courtyard caught his attention like a sore thumb.

'_Welcome to the family, son.'_

-----

Logan sat in the small off campus bar, he had been feeling shitty since that afternoon when he had seen the bench and recalled the small prank truce that had occurred between him and the spunky brunette. Though it was not the memory of the confrontation with Richard that had him in a funk, it was the reasoning behind the confrontation; he had wanted to put a claim on Rory. Exactly what he had denied during their prior conversation. She had been so mad at him, he felt terrible, he had spent that night much the same way, sulking in the nearest bar. Although, this time, Finn was trying to impress the strawberry blonde bartender with his peanut catching skills. Needless to say, by the time he had missed the seventh bar nut she was far from impressed. 

"So, I had an idea for my birthday." Finn announced, after a stray nut had caused him a near disastrous stool wobble.

"Let me guess, it involves costumes, alcohol and absolutely no food?" Colin said dryly.

Finn shot him an annoyed look, "Yes, but this time, you can all dress up in eighties digs and then be in for a fun night of eighties karaoke!" He clearly found this the most ingenious idea since… well, his _'Priscilla' _party in 8th grade. 

"No Finn!" Logan whined, "Why not your Boy Band/Girl Band idea? Anything but karaoke! I'll even wear the wife beater!"

Alas, Finn was resolute on his decision, if Finn wanted to get people singing _'Culture Club'_ and _'Duran Duran' _he would get his wish. Logan would just have to think of a way to throw himself down the stairs just hard enough to re-brake a few bones, but not kill himself –or send his memory back to 1995.

"Paris, this is the third bar tonight!" her familiar voice traveled across the bar, gaining Logans attention while Colin continued in vain to talk Finn out of a karaoke party.

"Suck it up Rory! This was your idea, not mine."

"Yeah, but I didn't want to turn it into a torture device. My hair still hurts from you curling it, I have no desire to pluck my eyebrows ever again, and this skirt just screams 'come and get it' like nothing else in my wardrobe… I swear it was only in there as a joke!" It occurred to Logan that it wasn't her voice carrying, but rather his desire to hear it, the thought alone made him sink towards the bar, trying to get by unnoticed.

"Well, I think it's time someone came and got it, you have _no _social life."

Logan couldn't help it, he snuck a peak at her from across the room. She looked amazing, but she didn't look like Rory. Her hair was curled around her face, her bags swept to the side, her eye make-up was dark, bringing out the blue in her eyes. She wore a tight blue singlet and a short black skirt reaching mid thigh at the most. He watched as a young brunette man approached them, watched as Paris excused herself, watched as Rory blushed, watched as she joined the man at his table.

"Was that Gilmore? In a bar? With a guy? Since when does she _choose _to go out to bars?" Colin said, peering over Logans shoulder with wide eyes.

"Since Blondie decided she needed a social life." Logan informed his friends before turning back to his scotch.

"I'm going to tell her about my birthday!" Finn announced, jumping up before either friend could protest. "Hey Rory!"

"Finn!" Thankfully the rest of her company (consisting of pick-up line Kyle, the brunette who asked her over to the table, Leo and Mathew, she wasn't sure which was which, and their two very blonde, very revealing dates.) didn't notice the look of relief that flushed over her features.

"Love! I know what I'm doing for my birthday!" Finn announced, leaning casually against the table.

"Ah, but you just have to put it past me first right?" Rory teased.

"Yes, here it is; Eighties Karaoke!"

"Oh no! I suck at karaoke Finn! My last experience had me singing _'Baby Face' _without saying the word baby." Rory winced, reflecting upon the not too pleasurable day that was Sherry's baby shower.

"Well mine will be fantastic!" Finn announced stubbornly, "I'll give you the details ASAP. Oh, and feel free to bring your blonde friend, Colin was awfully wound up over the whole Josie incident last year."

"Sorry Finn, she's accounted for, though, she's in a funk about it at the moment." Rory said with a small smile, she didn't want Finn to leave just yet, Kyle and what's-their-faces were deep in conversation about sports, she really wanted to be saved.

"Well, I'm feeling terribly sober. Don't be a stranger Love." With a wink he was gone, leaving her with the Paris approved re-bound guy market.

"So, you like parties?" Leo or Mathew asked.

"Not really, he's just a friend of mine." Rory said with a smile.

"He's friends with Huntzberger and McCrae right? Their parties are legendary." Kyles face was one of awe, Rory desperately wanted to roll her eyes.

"They're alright, lots of alcohol… the food is always too salty if Finn has his say in things. Logan thinks it's because he's Australian, I think it's because he's Finn." She felt a bit lame talking about the salt content of the food at these parties, but she was as well informed on the party scene as she was when it came to sports. She didn't know what to look for, and she was coming off as a real idiot.

"How'd you fall in with that crowd anyway?" Blonde One asked, looking over longingly at the three boys. Rory turned her head and was faced with a pang of jealousy, there was Logan. He was chatting up some girl, she was pretty, and she looked comfortable in her too high heels.

"I, uh…" Rory started, but before she could finish her thought Blonde Two had stepped in.

"You _so _dated one of them! So, spill, was he good?"

Rory felt her face flush and did not miss the small smile that came to Kyle's face when he heard this.

"So, you want to get out of here?" he whispered in an attempted husky tone. She had to admit, Logans blunt but cheeky innuendos were much more appealing. How was she supposed to find a rebound guy if she couldn't even get over Logan enough to feel anything for another guy?

"Uh… No, I have to go, I'm feeling a bit sick and my friend will need a ride home… I have to go." With that she jumped out of her seat and went off in search of Paris.

He had caught the way her face fell when she saw him with Millie… or Lilly, he felt a bit guilty for it, but she was with some guy too. He had felt jealous, he had been getting to know her so quickly, and while he didn't have every piece of the puzzle, he felt a slash to his pride when he saw her with another guy.

"She looks completely trapped mate." Finn laughed, coming back over to the bar and ordering four tequila shots, "Think we should go save her?"

Colin looked over to the table where Rory definitely looked trapped, before she politely excused herself and looked rather frantically around the bar for her friend, "Nah, looks like she's making a run for it."

Now he couldn't feel jealousy, only guilt. 

"So, what did she think of your idea Finn?" Colin challenged, oblivious to Logans face, which was contorted in thought.

"Oh, she loved it, mate. Adored it."

Tonight he would have to give Tillie a miss, he laughed that he was too sore for any strenuous activities. But really, being with someone else would just be too strenuous on his head, he wasn't sure if he could take the complications. Some might say that he had made his bed, and now he had to lay in it, but it really felt like someone else had made it for him.

Colin watched with curiosity as Logan shut what's-her-face down. He knew there must have been more going on than his health conditions, the old Logan would have settled for a blow in the bathroom, but this was the new Logan. Not the Logan before Rory, not the Logan with Rory, but the Logan remembering Rory.

-----

_Ok, thanks so much for your reviews… and I finally hit 100 alerts! I don't want to spoil the story, I'm halfway through chapter 10, but some of the complaints / suggestions I have been receiving have actually been addressed in later chapters (or addressed on the sheet of A4 paper that is my plot outline. Please continue to review and tell me if it stops making sense._


	8. Insecurities

Chapter Four: Just Friends

_Chapter __Eight: Insecurities._

Rory stood outside her grandparents home, gripping the paper coffee cup tightly in on hand. _'Here goes nothing' _she thought to herself as she reached forward and rang the bell she had rung so many times prior. She could not remember a time when she had been more reluctant to push the small button than now. This was the first Friday night dinner since Lorelai died. It had been five weeks now, five weeks of _'Sorry grandmother, I'm just swamped at the paper!' _or _'I've really got to catch up on my school work, I'm really far behind.'_

"_Andrea!? ANDREA?! The door! Oh, useless woman! Completely intolerable! I guess I'll just have to get it myself then Andrea, wont I?" _She heard Emily from the other side of the door, this would be Andreas last day at the Gilmore house.

"Rory! What a pleasant surprise!" Her grandmother said with a larger than natural smile.

"It's Friday night dinner Grandma." Rory said, stepping into the house and secretly slipping her coffee cup in the bin by the door.

"Yes, but we weren't expecting you, you've missed five dinners, I just assumed..." Emily said, ushering Rory towards the sitting room for drinks.

"I called those times grandma; I wouldn't not show up unless I called first with a good reason. It's been hectic lately." Rory defended.

"Richard, look who's here." Emily said with faux brightness to her husband.

Richard lowered his paper and removed his spectacles to get a good look at the visitor, "Rory! We weren't expecting you."

"Rory says we should have been." Emily said in a manner that made Rory all too uncomfortable.

"But she's missed the last five dinners, I just assumed…"

"She says that she'd always call first if she wasn't coming." Emily observed.

"Well Rory, it's good to see you." Richard said with a nod towards Rory before he re adjusted his spectacles and went back to reading his newspaper.

"It's good to see you too Grandpa." Rory said with a smile, sitting down on the all too large sofa.

"Well, I'll go see if Jacinta has made enough food, and find that delinquent of a maid while I'm at it!" Emily walked out of the room towards the kitchen, her voice echoing back to them, "ANDREA! Come set the table! We have another guest!"

"Would you like a drink Rory?" Richard asked, barely looking up from the financial section.

"A club soda would be lovely, Grandpa." Rory requested politely.

"Certainly," Richard stood up and placed the folded paper on the coffee table, "just a minute then." He stood up and began making the drinks, the ghost of Lorelai leaving an awkward silence and emptiness in the room, felt and ignored by all.

It was ten o'clock. Rory slumped down on the couch, dinner had been horrible, the silence at the table echoed with every word her mother had spoken there. She should have cancelled again. The only reason Rory had gone to dinner was to escape Paris, she had chosen to pick the lesser of two evils –how wrongly she had chosen. Paris had been taking her out every night that week. She had blisters the size of bowling balls on her feet, she had been poked in the eye by Paris with eyeliner too many times to count, she was afraid of going bald from Paris' hair curling techniques.

Rory ran her hand through her hair as she slipped out of her dress and shoes and into some Yale sweats and a singlet top. She wouldn't work, read or socialize tonight she would finally get some rest and relaxation in front of something silly, like Willy Wonka, or maybe even Edward Scissor Hands.

"RORY!" Paris scolded, walking into the main room and snatching the packet of lolly snakes out of Rorys hand.

"Hey! I was eating those!" Rory whined.

"Quick, get out of those sweats, we can still hit at least two clubs."

"Paris! Please… I'm tired!" she was sounding more and more like a two year old.

"I'll turn on the hair curler." Paris said, turning towards the bathroom.

"No! Wait!" Rory said, an idea coming to her head that might just satisfy both her and Paris, "I haven't been having any luck with all this bothering have I Paris?" She asked rhetorically, "So, maybe, if I don't bother and just go out in sweats and a singlet, no make-up and my hair loose I'll pick up!"

To Rory's surprise Paris actually considered it, once she put the idea into words it sounded completely ridiculous, she didn't want to go out, and she didn't want to go out in her pajamas either, though she was more partial to that idea than wearing Paris' mile high heels.

"You might be onto something there." Paris concluded, her mind was a scientific one, Rory hadn't managed to find a rebound guy when she was all dolled up, so it figures that if she didn't get all dolled up the rebound guys would be lining up for miles right? Her knowledge of dating wasn't that extensive.

"Really?" Rory asked, disbelieving.

"Yeah, let's go." Paris grabbed Rory by the wrist, pulled her off the sofa and out to door into the wide, wide world.

"So the police officer says; 'I don't know… but he's got the pope driving him around!" Finns joke was responded to with a small explosion of laughter from the group he was sitting with.

"OHMIGAWSH!" Juliet shrieked, looking towards the entrance of The Rich Mans Shoe where Rory and Paris were currently situated. Logan looked over at Rory, she was dressed extremely casually, as if she was just expecting to lounge around the house. There was something sexy about that, she gave off the I-don't-have-to-bother-to-be-sexy vibe. She still looked uncomfortable though.

"Is that Gilmore?" Rosemary asked with disbelief.

"I'm going to kill her!" Juliet said playfully, excusing herself from the booth to go greet her friend.

"She never lets us take her out on Fridays!" Rosemary said with a roll of her eye and followed Juliet out of the booth.

"Paris. This is ridiculous." Rory whined, stomping her foot. She felt completely out of place in her Yale sweat pants and plain white singlet top. She may as well have sleepwalked over there.

"Rory darling!" Rosemary cheered, hugging her friend as they reached her from the other end of the bar.

"Oh… hi Rosemary, hey Juliet." Rory said quietly, chewing on her lip in nervousness, they were wearing heels and short skirts. Perhaps having Paris rip her to shreds wasn't as bad as she thought, at least then she didn't feel like a black sheep. _I just feel like someone else._

"Now Rory dear, how come we never get to take you out on a Friday?" Juliet asked, kissing Rory once on each cheek.

"Well, I just got back from dinner at my grandparents and was about to settle in front of the TV for the night when I got dragged out to go _'pick up guys'_." Rory said, trying to sound light and joking.

"Wearing that?" Juliet asked, always one for bluntness.

"I'm trying something new." Rory informed her, "Whenever I try too hard, people just want to get in my pants, so I'm trying not bothering."

"That's genius!" Rosemary said with a big grin, "I try every night and all I seem to get is Finn trying to take me home! Maybe if I don't bother anymore River Phoenix will come and sweep me off my feet!"

"Yeah… but River Phoenix is dead…" Rory said, unsure whether Rosemary was aware of that fact or not.

"Well that would put a downer on the relationship." Rosemary said contemplatively.

"Um… Rory?" Paris demanded, "What about the plan? I have a paper to study for so I need to get back soon-ish"

"Oh… well, if you want these two can help me out and you can go study." Rory suggested, not wanting Paris to think that she was giving her the slip.

"Great. Bye." Paris said briskly, giving Rory a short stiff hug and turning on her heel to leave.

"Oh! There's a cute guy!" Rosemary said, pointing to a guy across the bar.

"I feel ridiculous guys, can't I just get some drinks with you and relax. It's been a stressful night." Rory said, the exhaustion weaving itself into her voice.

"Uh… that's not such a good idea." Rosemary said, looking at her feet.

"Why not?" Rory asked, trying to hide the hurt she felt from being shunned.

"Logan has a date." Juliet said straightforwardly.

"Oh… well that's fine. I'm totally ok with it." Rory said, none too convincingly.

"Cool!" The two girls said in a uniform squeal, not noticing Rory's half-heartedness, before pulling her over to the booth and squeezing in with everyone else.

"Hey Rory!" The part of the table that was familiar to her chorused.

"Where are the bunny slippers, Ace?" Logan asked with an amused grin.

"In all seriousness, they were the only item of clothing Paris let me change before I walked out the door." Rory said with a groan.

"Hey! I'm Bec, but you can call me Rebecca Freeman." A chirpy blonde girl said from next to Logan.

Rory stifled her laughter as Logan gestured she should flip the introduction around, "Hey Bec, I'm Rory." She said with a convincing smile.

"You were wearing bunny slippers too?" Logan asked, barely suppressing his grin.

"I was planning on sitting back, watching TV. A bit of Wonka or Scissor Hands." She defended with a slight huff, feeling more and more out place with every second.

"The Oompa Loompas scare me." Bec announced with a scrunched up nose.

"My mum used to have a reoccurring dream about marrying one." Rory responded with a fond smile, one which quickly faded when Bec leaned in towards Logan. She knew she would have to deal with the jealousy one day. It may have come sooner than she hoped, but she was strong, she would live. She recovered quickly with a less than sincere smile and Finn decided to don the shining armor and come to her rescue.

"So, love. About my party that you were oh-so-keen on, I want your help selecting songs. Colin knows absolutely nothing about 80s music and Logan refuses to help me." Finn said in a dramatic tone before turning a pleading eye to Rory.

"I gave up my party planning with the DAR, Finn." Rory rolled her eyes before continuing, she couldn't say no to that face, "But I will give you a list of songs and bands that are a must have."

"You're a member of the DAR?" Bec chirped excitedly, the rest of the table rolled their eyes at this while Rory tried her best to remain polite.

"Uh… yeah… I was." Rory said with a small smile.

"Really? How'd you get in?" She asked eagerly while Colin and Finn feigned sleep with their heads resting together.

"My Grandma was a member." Rory responded, begging the others to change the topic.

"Is your mother a member too?" She asked, not noticing the strained silence that engulfed the table, not one person knowing how Rory would react.

Rory felt the familiar tug on her insides she felt whenever her mother was mentioned or thought of. She forced on a small smile before speaking again, "No, but she's a self proclaimed member of the D-A-R-N. Her words, not mine." She responded, hoping that by keeping the conversation light and in the present tense she would be off the hook and out of there sooner than Bec could say debutante.

Bec looked confused while the rest of the group chuckled, "I don't get it." She said simply, still smiling while her eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

"Don't worry sweetheart, my Grandma didn't like that joke either. Now, if you excuse me I'm going to go get a drink… or two." Rory said with a tight smile as she stood and wandered over to the bar.

"I'm going to go touch up my make-up." Bec declared before turning to Rosemary and Juliet, "You two want to join me?"

Rosemary and Juliet shook their heads in a fervent attempt to keep away from the chirpy blonde girl who merely shrugged her shoulders in ignorant bliss.

"Now I know what happens if you bang your head against too many headboards." Juliet muttered, to the general laughter of the crowd.

Rory sat back down at the table to wait for her drink to arrive, she looked curiously at the laughing faces, "Wow, I'll have what you guys are having." She said with a bemused smile.

"Well, she's not the brightest kid on the block, but she is hot." Finn defended as Juliet rolled her eyes.

"Who are we talking about?" Rory asked with furrowed eyebrows.

"They're slandering my date." Logan supplied with a less than heartfelt harrumph.

"Well… sure, she confused easily… but she's sweet. I had a friend like her at Chilton, she was always nice. Partly because she would forget that she wasn't supposed to be speaking to me… but always nice and welcoming." Rory defended, she didn't like joining in on the slander.

The group stared at her slack jawed before Colin recollected his wits and spoke up, "Wouldn't you be… like… upset? Jealous?" He asked, causing Rory to blush. She really didn't want to get into that sort of conversation with Logan around.

"You're right Colin, I'm crushed." Logan said with a teasing smirk, "I thought you cared."

"Well was I going to come in and bite her head off?" Rory asked, agitated, "Should I have told her, that Logan and I were dating, seriously. In fact, we lived together for a while, did the whole sappy Valentines weekends, and were so head-over-heals in love that I even told my mother I thought he might be…" Her angry tone was lost to the end of her short rant and her eyes bulged with distress, she has said way too much. She had almost told an entire group of people, including said ex, that she thought he was _the _one.

"Be what?" Finn probed as the group, sans Logan, leaned in with interest. Logan had paled considerably and was looking for an escape route. Though it was not because he feared hearing about commitment, but rather because he hated hearing what he was now missing out on, the beautiful brunette before him could never be anything but a friend. He hated that all he could do was think about this innocent looking girl who held so many secrets, so much history, and depth. She was smart, funny, intriguing, and incredibly sexy in a naïve and unknowing manner. She could show up in Yale sweats and all he could think about was how good she looked, how… natural. He hated those thoughts.

"Huh?" Rory asked vaguely, not wanting to get into that conversation.

"You even told your mother that you thought he might be what?" Juliet questioned.

"A pretty swell guy?" Rory finished meekly.

"Ok, so you were in a serious relationship because you told your mother that you thoughthe _might _be a pretty _swell_ guy?" Colin asked with obvious disbelief.

"Yeah?" She could feel the pointed looks coming from around the table, she sunk back a bit in embarrassment and heard a chuckle coming from a grinning blonde boy. "And what's your problem Casanova?" Rory asked, giving him her best withering glare.

"Nothing, nothing." Logan claimed, still grinning, "No need to act… _goaded_." He teased.

"I am not goaded!" Rory protested.

"Jeez Ace, I wasn't kidding when I said angry works for you." Logan teased, he was telling the truth though. The seventeen shades of red she turned made him want to take her right there on the table.

Just then the bartender placed three shot glasses in front of Rory and she swallowed the first one readily.

"So Rory," Rosemary started, wanting to protect her friend from the misery the others were playfully inflicting, "How come we never see you around anymore?"

_That sounded familiar._Logan's head snapped up as Rosemary spoke.

"I'm around…" Rory said all too unconvincingly, "You know… library, classes, apartment… and the coffee cart too."

_Ding, Ding, Ding! Seymour Hersh! _

"I was going to take you." Logan blurted out before he could stop himself.

"What?" Rory asked with furrowed eyebrows.

"To the Seymour Hersh book thing-o. I was going to take you." Logan clarified, the room was starting to feel a bit hot.

"Oh!" Rory exclaimed, letting loose a small smile, "That was ages ago, how was it anyway?"

"You two dated?" Said an accusing voice coming from none other than Rebecca 'Headboard-Banging' Freeman.

Down goes shot number two.

"Yeah, they did." Steph answered for them with a dry smile.

"How serious was it?" She asked, glancing between the accused.

Rory jumped in before anyone could make the situation any more awkward, "Logan doesn't even remember it, that's how serious it was." She waved her hand in dismissal and Bec, either unaware or forgetful of Logans amnesia was satisfied. She grinned and squeezed back in next to Logan, giving him a peck on the lips that made Rory's stomach want to fall out her butt. Her chest was constricting.

And shot number three was gone. She needed more shots.

"Hey, look, I'm all out… I'm going to go get some more." She said with a forced laugh.

"Hey Bec, why don't you go stop her before she gets too drunk?" Rosemary suggested.

"Why me?" Bec asked her confused features taking reign over her face again.

"Because I think she really looks up to you," Rosemary lied, "You'd be a good role model."

"Oh, I didn't know she liked me _that _much." Bec said with a grin before skipping off to find Rory.

"She's going to hate you for that, doll." Finn observed.

"Logan," Rosemary began in a hushed whisper while Juliet engaged conversation with the other boys, "Do you like Rory?"

"Yeah, I guess…" Logan answered, unsure where this was going.

"Do you want some other guy to date her?" She didn't need an answer, Logans face gave him away. No, he didn't want any other guys dating her.

"Do the other girls compare to her?" _Her eyes? Her smile? Her laugh? Her conversation? Her jokes? That kiss? _He hadn't met a girl who could compare to her, she made him laugh, look at things differently… and actually care.

"No." he reluctantly admitted.

"Good, now, do you want her?" The question was so vague, did he want her? He wanted to hold her, to kiss her, to be able to call her whenever, to laugh with her whenever. He wanted to be able to flirt with her shamelessly without having to worry about the consequences. He wanted her. All of her. Rosemary saw the realization cross his face and smiled.

"I don't understand why she likes me. I can't remember doing anything nice to her… I mean, she seems like… perfect and I'm just screwing her around."

"But she thinks you're perfect. No matter how badly you fuck up she loves you… I bet she hates that more than anything. Anyway… you're about where you were this time last year, at Finns party." She informed him.

"What? How do you? I don't remember? Huh?" Logan asked, confused by how his friend had come to that conclusion.

"This isn't the first time we've had this conversation Logan." She said with a small smile before turning back to Bec who was dragging along a reluctant Rory, faux smile in place.

"So, why did you quit the DAR?" Bec asked in an awfully chipper voice, the table all but groaned in despair.

"Not quite my scene." Rory responded vaguely, it was the truth, though after a bit if a blowout with her grandparents earlier that year Emily had kicked her out mercilessly. Love was never quite unconditional.

"But every girl wants that kind of life!" Bec argued, causing Rory to choke slightly on the glass of water she had ordered.

"What?!" She demanded.

"The pretty dresses –and the salmon puffs! It's like, my dream job!" Announced Bec with a dreamy smile.

Rory looked at her skeptically before coming to the conclusion that she was infact serious. "Well, even Barbie became a stewardess." She said with a small smile. Logan had definitely gone back to his old ways, for a guy who claimed not to want to be like his father, and not to want to marry a trophy wife, he sure wasn't doing a good job at avoiding it.

"Barbie is a doll… they can't get jobs." Bec pointed out with a roll of her eyes. She had been talking to Rory in a slightly condescending manner ever since she had walked over to cancel Rory's drink order. Rory was actually being patronized by someone too thick to even know what the word meant. If she wasn't careful Rory might just go Wild Kingdom on her and pounce like a lion.

"My mistake." Rory said with a stiff smile. "Look… I think I'm going to grab a cab and call it a night." She pulled out her phone to dial the cab company when she noticed a text message in the corner.

_Doyle n I made up. Don't rush back –Paris._

"Aww jeez!" Rory whined, slumping back in her chair.

"What happened?" Logan asked, he tried to come off nonchalant but the under lacing of concern was evident in his tone.

"Paris made up with Doyle so unless I want to catch them in the middle of their non-stop sex marathon, I'm going to be staying in the hollow tonight."

"Like editor Doyle?" Logan asked, shuddering when Rory confirmed his assumptions with a nod. "You can crash at my place." Logan offered.

"I don't think that's the best idea…" Rory said hesitantly.

"Yeah, if she's at your place what's to stop you from jumping each other as soon as the elevator closes." Juliet said with a giggle.

"Oh my God!" Rory cried, blushing furiously, "I wouldn't do _that _in an elevator!"

"So the pink lacy bra we found wasn't yours, love?" Finn asked earnestly.

Rory blushed, she had actually been missing a pink lacy bra… and panties… for a while now. "Finn!" She scolded, blushing even more furiously as the rest of the table erupted in laughter.

"I feel like I'm missing out, Ace." Logan said, smirking at her the whole time.

"Why don't you crash at Finns?" Rosemary asked.

"Because you'll be there doll." Finn said with a wink at Rosemary. Rosemary leant over and whispered something in Finns ear, causing his face to light up in a smile. "You can crash on my fold out couch, reporter girl, I might even give you back what's yours."

"No funny business?" Rory asked.

"None at all, love. I'm saving that for my lovely Rosemary." He slung his arm around the redhead who rolled her eyes playfully.

"Alright then… saves me driving all the way to Stars Hollow." Rory agreed, not noticing the slightly disappointed look on Logans face. Rosemary however, was doing a good impersonation of the Cheshire cat.

As soon as they had arrived at Finns apartment, Rory collapsed on the couch, ignoring Finn who was howling out the window.

"Why did I let you talk me into this Finn?" Rory asked, not expecting the intoxicated Finn to answer her. Much to her surprise, a sudden shift of weight on the couch indicated Finns arrival next to her on the couch.

"So that we can talk." Finn answered, trying to focus his eyes on her but failing miserably.

"What do you want to talk about?" Rory asked.

"Why do you like Logan?" While Finn spoke he removed his cell phone from his pocket, inconspicuously pressing speed dial number four at the same time.

_RING RING!_

Logan groaned and grabbed his phone, it was Finn. Trust Finn to have gotten into some kind of trouble the second Logan got home. Logan flipped the phone open, "How much is bail?" he sighed.

"_What! Finn! That's… that's… why do you want to know?"_

"Rory?" Logan asked, growing confused.

"_You can't resist me, love! So, why do you like him?"_Finns voice was now coming across the line, Finn must have accidentally called Logan mid conversation… he should probably hang up, right? His fingers couldn't do the chore, so instead he listened in silence.

"_Ugh! Well, Logan's beautiful… but you know that." _Rory started, causing Logan to smirk.

"_No lo__ve, I honestly don't look at him that way."_

"_Keep telling yourself that, Finny. I mean, sure, he has done some pretty shitty things, but then he goes and does something… amazing. __Not just the large things, like throwing me a party, buying me a bag or hiring me a coffee cart for a day, but little things too. He took me to a Sri Lankan restaurant once, and whenever I asked what the meat was he'd just tell me it was chicken-"_

"_So he lies?" _Finn asked, wondering how that could be a good trait.

"_No, because he knew me well enough to know that I'd never eat frie__d lizard. And he's smart! Smarter than me." _Logans scoffed slightly, only to be insulted when Finn mimicked his action.

"_Sorry love, Logan must have had you on a stream of drugs. __You still get the prize for biggest nerd."_

"_Um… thanks? I can't pinpoint why I like him Finn… but he makes me laugh. He argues back and I don't know… I just love him." _Logan let out a small laugh at Rory's defensive tone, she clearly wasn't enjoying this conversation. _"But I can't do it again."_

"_Do what doll?"_

"_Make him like me… I mean, I got lucky the first time, but I'm not like those other girls. I'm not that pretty or that… uh…"_

"_Stupid? Slutty? Tasteless?" _Finn supplied.

"_Yeah, but now that Logan has that again… the situation just wont be the same. I just… I should move on."_

"_But you don't want to?"_

"_Gosh, how can you be so drunk _and_ insightful?"_

"_You're right! I shouldn't be like this! It's like an Osborne speaking without profanities!"_

"_At least you can make out their swear words."_

Logan hung up the phone once the conversation got nonsensical and Finn started howling again. Logan had decided that he wasn't going to give up now. He wasn't the person to just give up because things were complicated, so he was going to get what he wanted. He wanted her. To do that he needed to take action.

_Yay! Logan is finally getting into the game, tune in next time to find out how! __This wasn't the best chapter, but I think I slipped in enough points to be able to move the story along. Please review and tell me what you think. I really like to hear from you._


	9. ThirtySix

Chapter Four: Just Friends

_Chapter __Nine: Thirty-Six._

"_Girls just wanna… have fun?" She said hesitantly before smiling up at him, who was he to argue with that? He followed her dumbstruck as she egged him on, confusion finally taking over. He wanted to know what was happening._

"_Where are we going?" He asked, sounding stupid as she grabbed a champagne bottle._

"_What? You think I have a plan? Live in the moment Huntzberger!" She teased. He gave a cautionary glance around the room to make sure that no one was watching before following her into the dark cloak room._

…

_As he drove away with his shirt buttons still undone he sighed to himself, as much as it freaked him out being interrupted by her mother, her father, and the mothers extremely large boyfriend, he doubted that he could stay away. She was amazing, he felt like the luckiest guy in the world._

Logan woke and rubbed his eyes. Wow. If he had trouble getting her out of his head before, he was a doomed man now. He looked over at the clock. He needed to get up if he was going to do what he needed to do before lunch.

--

Dr. Wilson walked out of his office; he had a slight lull in clients today and was looking forward to his lunch break, then he had to fill out a truck load of paper work and his wife had been dropping hints about their anniversary for months. He made a mental note to reserve a table at her favorite restaurant before making his way into the waiting room.

"Logan? What are you doing here?" Wilson asked in surprise as he looked up from his planner and spied the young blonde man sitting anxiously in one of the chairs.

"Well Doc," Logan answered with a smirk, "I want to remember."

--

Rory groaned and sunk her head into the pillows. Finn was more exasperating than she had thought. Contraire to popular belief, Finn had no problem getting up in the early hours of the morning, so long as his thick curtains blocked out any light threatening to get in. Now he was trying to cook her breakfast which consisted of sausages, potatoes, and a lot of salt.

She had tried calling Rosemary who had made some lame excuse. Juliet couldn't make it because she 'had company', Collins phone had simply rung out and Paris was too busy with 'morning after activities'. She wouldn't have called Logan, but when she went to shower and saw that the bathroom lock was stuck open thanks to large the quantities of chewing gum that had been strategically shoved there, and Finns various suggestions on how to 'save water', she gave in and decided to call him.

With one final groan she pulled her head out of the pillows and dialed the number.

"Hello?" Asked an awfully chipper voice.

"Alcohol impairs the thought process." She groaned.

"Rory?" Logan asked, confused.

"At Finns. Can't shower. Can't get out."

"Why on earth would you go to Finns?" Logan asked, not wanting her to know that he had overheard their conversation the night before.

"Alcohol impairs the thought process." She repeated, before meekly adding, "Come and get me?"

"Why'd you call me?" Logan asked lightly.

"Rosemary is a cow, Juliet has a 'friend' over, Colin is avoiding me and Paris has 'morning after' activities." Rory said with a wince.

"So I'm a last resort?" Logan asked with mock hurt.

"Your ego will get better." She rolled her eyes.

"I'm going to ignore that." Logan laughed, "Anyway, you're in luck, I'm about five minutes away, on my way back from an… appointment."

"Thank you, thank you, thank you!" Rory squealed, ignoring his mention of an appointment in fear of him being on his way back from his date, Rebecca's, house, "You're armor is _really_ shiny from where I'm standing! I think I'm going to build you a shrine! A monument! Name a country after you."

"Because that wouldn't be creepy at all, would it kid?" Logan deadpanned, unaware of what he was saying.

"Not at all… _kiddo. _Keep that up and it's going to be one small shrine."

"Right… so many other things I could call you…" Logan mumbled, the memory starting the piece itself together in his brain. "Wow… two in one day… Wilson must really be something."

Rory stared at her phone in shock. "Wilson… like psychiatrist Wilson? Like, get over the amnesia Wilson? Like you're trying to remember Wilson?" Rory asked with amazement and excitement.

"Um… I'll see you soon Ace. Bye." Logan hung up the phone. He didn't know what his next move was yet.

--

"Finn!" Logan heard Rory cry out as he silently entered Finns apartment.

"What Love?" Finn asked innocently.

"That's disgusting!" Rory responded, repulsion evident in her voice. Logan walked towards the bedroom where the sounds were coming from and observed the scene from the doorframe. Finn was laying on the bed, propped up on his hands and grinning and Rory cheekily, while Rory glared at him and pointed viciously at the headboard.

"What's disgusting?" Logan asked, causing Rory to jump.

"Hey Logan." Finn greeted cheerily.

"Jeez! You should come with a warning next time!" Rory's hand was against her chest and she glared at him with feigned annoyance.

"What's disgusting?" Logan repeated.

"He," She pointed an accusing finger at Finn, "actually has notches in his bedpost." The finger swiveled over to the bedpost, where eighteen little chips in the wood could be seen.

Finn shrugged his shoulders with nonchalance while Logan laughed, "That is slightly disturbing Finn."

"Like you can talk." Finn scoffed. Logan paled slightly as Rory turned towards him with narrowed eyes.

"I have no idea what you're talking about Finn." Logan spat out through clenched teeth.

"You may not have had literal notches, but you kept count."

Rory was stuck somewhere between complete revulsion, and curiosity. As always, the curiosity persevered. She just had to hope that satisfaction would be bringing this cat back. "And how many would that be?" She asked cautiously.

Logan shook his head furiously, an action that went by completely unnoticed by Finn.

"Thirty-six was the count before you came along love. By the time you got ballsy enough to ask him out he was pining like a girl, making excuses as to why he couldn't shack up…" Finns tone changed to one of mimicry, "_I have a major paper due… my roommate's in the hospital…I'm out of condoms… I can't participate in any _strenuous _activities…_"

Rory's mouth dropped open. Thirty-six. _Thirty-six! _"Thirty-six?" She asked rhetorically, "Thirty-six and a wedding party! No wonder you wouldn't tell me! Thirty-six!

"A wedding party?" Logan asked meekly, only to be ignored by Rory who still hadn't picked her mouth up off the floor.

"What about you Love?" Finn asked innocently.

Rory snapped her mouth shut at the question. "I am _so _not having this conversation!"

"So… you need a lift?" Logan asked sheepishly.

"And a shower, I feel dirty." Rory shuddered, starting to move towards the door to grab her bag.

"Oh! Love! I have something of yours!" Finn said, jumping off the bed and towards the cupboard where he began to rummage through the draws. "Ah ha!" He cried, pulling something pink out of the drawer and waving it wildly above his head. "I found it!"

"Oh my god." Rory murmured, going bright red as Finn waved her bra above his head. "Where did you get that!" She screeched as she ran over to him and tried to snatch it from his hands.

"Told you last night love, in the elevator! Honestly love, wouldn't have thought of you as the elevator type."

Logan laughed as Rory finally succeeded in retrieving the bra and shoved it into her handbag. Her face was redder than Santa's coat as she turned back to Logan. "So, uh, should we go?"

"Sure Ace," Logan smirked, "Just keep your hands to yourself in the elevator… I don't want you talking advantage of me."

Rory glared at the two boys before saying her goodbyes to Finn.

--

"Then, he insisted on calling the restaurant, at six in the morning, to make his 'special birthday reservations', only to go into a sulk when the very grumpy bread guy informed him that they don't do private parties of that size, or karaoke. Then, I made the mistake of telling him that a small bar in Stars Hollow called KC's, has a karaoke lounge. He then proceeded to call the bar –which was closed, then the manager, Taylor's, house, Kirks mother's house, _and_, the Dragonfly Inn! Which is in a complete mess by the way ever since… since… well... anyways, Three weeks from now he is having his party in _Stars Hollow! _All organized between the hours of six and eight in the _morning_!" Rory whined as the made their way across town in Logans silver Porsche.

"Isn't Stars Hollow like… a half hour drive away?" Logan asked, his eyes glancing briefly at her before returning to the road.

"Mmhm." She confirmed, "He's hiring 'Party Bus'' to get people there, and then organizing accommodation."

"Ah." Logan nodded, he was used to Finns abstract birthday ideas.

"Wasn't his birthday earlier last year?" Rory asked with furrowed eyebrows.

Logan shook his head and inhaled as he turned the corner, "I couldn't tell you, Ace."

"Right… I was pretty sure his birthday was near the semester break or something." She scrunched up her nose in confusion.

"We don't know when Finns birthday is." Logan said with a small smile.

"What?" Rory asked, obviously not satisfied with this revelation.

"Finn has never told us when his birthday is. When he wants a birthday party he just… has one." He shrugged his shoulders like it was the most natural thing in the world while Rory stared at him with wide eyes.

"He won't tell you?" She asked.

"Pretty much." Logan agreed.

"Wow." Rory turned her head back towards the road and recognized their location, "Why are we at your place?" She asked.

"Well, I don't know where Paris' place is, I'm pretty sure you don't want to be involved in whatever their 'morning after' activities involve, and, most importantly, my bathroom lock works." Logan answered, and seeing that Rory was content with his reasoning continued, "I still can't believe Paris shacked up with the editor. Hell, I can't believe Doyle shacked up."

"Yeah, well, he's not the editor anymore." Rory told him.

"Right! Senior year!" Logan acknowledged, "So who's the new editor?"

"I am." Rory answered with a small smile before climbing out of his car and making her way towards the buildings entrance.

--

Rory climbed the steps to Paris' apartment slowly. She had had fun with Logan, light conversation, teasing banter. Still, she could not get one thought from her head. Thirty-six. She frowned before her eyes fell upon a small blonde girl grinning stupidly by her door. Juliet waved excitedly at Rory, beckoning her over.

"What are you doing here Juliet?" Rory asked.

"Here." Juliet shoved two invitations into Rory's hands.

"To Finns party?" Rory asked in surprise, reading the contents. "How'd he get them so fast… and why two?"

"Yes, Finn works fast when it comes to parties." Rory had to admit that was true, he had done a lot of planning when she was at his house, as unorthodox as it had been, "And two is because you get to bring a 'friend'."

"Do you get to bring a 'friend' too?" Rory asked.

Juliet smiled dreamily, "I don't need a second one."

"Ok missy, what's got you so happy?" Rory asked.

"I did something slutty!" Juliet grinned, causing Rory to frown a little. "What's got your panties in a bunch?"

"Logan did a lot of something slutty." Rory answered darkly.

"He didn't go home with what's-her-face. You were too nice to her by the way. I would have sunk my teeth in." Juliet continued to smile contently.

"So, who's the guy then?" Rory asked, wanting to change the subject, but relieved that Logans appointment had not been with Bec.

"My lips are sealed. Anyway, so, I turned down Finns extra invite… only to realize that I kind of needed it." Juliet confessed.

"Then… ask for another."

"You know how fast Finn works, he'll be organizing something and then BAM! It's all over, he's sitting back on the couch again only moving to grab more fosters."

"Right. Well… maybe if you told me who the lucky guy is…" Rory hinted, wanting to know who had Juliet in such a good mood.

"My cousin."

Rory pulled a face. "Ew Juliet! That's just… ew." She shuddered slightly.

"NO! I'm not taking my cousin, you are." Juliet confirmed and Rory felt herself relax slightly before the words sunk in.

"What? Me take him! Nuh-uh! I'm not doing blind dates." Rory refused shaking hr head frantically.

"Please! He's coming into the state for some work thing-o… he's here for a couple of months." Juliet explained.

"Fine. I'll do it –the more the merrier right?" Rory conceded.

"Great! Thank you so much! Oh, and I told him that he wont be getting any, so he'll try and keep the lewd remarks to a minimum. Now, I have a lunch date… I owe you. Ta!" Juliet bounced down the steps, looking completely out of place in her designer clothing. Rory rolled her eyes, she had no idea where Juliet got all her energy from, she ate less than a rabbit.

Rory checked that the coast was clear before letting herself into the apartment. No Paris or Doyle. All was good so far. She sat down on the couch let her cool façade fall. She let the sobs control her body and she wrung her hands pathetically in her lap, she should have been a drama major.

--

_BZZZ BZZZ!_

Logan groaned and walked over to the intercom, he pressed the little green button and spoke into the receiver.

"Hello?"

"Um, I have a delivery for Mr. Huntzberger." A mans voice replied. Logan buzzed him up and waited for the fateful knock on the door. He opened the door to reveal a delivery man with a clipboard and long thin package.

"Who's it from?" Logan asked as he signed for the package.

"No idea man," the delivery guy said, "I just deliver the stuff."

Logan closed the door as the delivery guy walked away and looked curiously at the package. He was never a man of patience however and quickly ripped off the postal wrapping. Inside was a tall thin rocket with the words 'United States' written in red lettering down the side. He raised his eyebrows in confusion before he spotted the note.

_Logan,_

_This is the rocket from 'The Long Morrow'. I checked and double checked for you. Great doing business with you. Hope your girl likes it._

_-Adam Sellars_

Sellars. That was Seth's last name. Maybe he would know something about what all this meant. He put the rocket on the kitchen bench, giving it one more puzzled glance before he went off in search of his cell phone, and with it Seth's number. Not spotting his cell phone anywhere immediately he began to get slightly frantic, he looked under the couch, behind the pillows, next to his laptop, under the bed… he did not find his phone under the bed. He did, however, spot something even more interesting. He reached his hand under the bed and pulled out a light pink lace panties that he had seen the matching bra of not one week ago. Rory. He groaned to himself at the thought. _That _was what he could have had. He shoved the panties in his bedside table and shut the door. He wasn't going to think about it.

--

Rory stood outside her childhood home for the second time since that life changing phone call. She ignored the numerous flowers that lay peacefully against the mail box and stared. She didn't want to go inside, she would play 'Little Match Girl' all night if she could, but she had promised that she would get the house set up for Finn, Colin, Logan, Juliet and Rosemary, the infamous five some. How she had been hoodwinked into all this was beyond her, but Finns party was that night, and she was playing gofer to their wild schemes, well, Finn and Juliet's wild schemes.

"You ready Ace?" A voice said from behind her, causing her to tense and swivel around to stare into the face that had become her Mecca over the past few months.

"What are you doing here?" She stuttered.

"Finn's due in an hour." Logan shrugged.

"So…?"

"I have to Finn-proof the town." Logan expanded. He showed no signs of starting this Finn-proofing however, rather her persisted to engage in the frustratingly calm gaze they held on each other.

"Do you… do you want to come in?" Rory suggested lamely after a sufficiently awkward silence.

"Sure, why not." Logan shrugged, following her slightly shaky path towards the front door. Her hands fumbled with the keys before she opened the door.

She was greeted with the familiar scent of perfume and flowers as she opened the door, she almost forgot that her mother was no longer here. She fought back the tears when she remembered. Babette must have refreshed the flowers, she used to do that occasionally before… well… she must have just continued changing the old flowers with new ones, waiting for Rory to come home.

"You ok Ace?" Logan asked from behind her, bringing her out of her daze.

Rory nodded, taking the precious seconds to regain her composure, and the use of her muscles. "Uhm… can you help me set up? Sheets are in the cupboard."

"Sure Ace." Logan agreed, setting to work on the tasks allocated to him. Though neither dared mention it, they both knew that the only reason Rory remained sane in her situation was because Logan was fluffing pillows right alongside her. She would never own up to this, she was independent. He would never bring it up, he aimed for independence. She couldn't have a hold on him.

"Rory?" Logan asks softly from behind the couch, hesitance in his voice, "How do you do all this? Deal with all this? I mean, I'm sent into a stupor after an hour with my dad but you're just…" he drifts off as he sees the distant look in her eye, scared that she is going to cry he turns back to the sheet he had been spreading across the couch.

He looks up in surprise as she answers him, "When people train for expeditions say, to Antarctica, they walk around for months before hand, carrying weights, dragging along tires. Eventually they become so used to dragging along this load that it gets easier for them… I mean, it's still there, following them, staring them in the face whenever they look back, but they deal with it. This is my load. Nothing left to do but deal." She smiled sadly at him as they finished setting up the last of the floor mattresses. "You want a drink?"

Logan nodded and followed Rory into the kitchen where she proceeded to open the fridge. Logan heard her groan in frustration and chose that moment to speak up, "What's the problem, Ace?"

"We have _no _supplies at all!" She whined, stepping aside to show Logan the completely spare fridge, sans two boxes of what looked like flea treatment. She picked up the post it note that lay atop one of these boxes.

'_Luke,_

_Paul Anka likes his flea treatment cold. He feels too sweaty if it's warm. Thanks hun!_

_xx Lorelai'_

Rory felt tears prick in the ducts of her eyes upon reading this short, ordinary note, but she pushed them aside and turned back to Logan with a slightly forced smile, "So, Dosee's?"

"What's a Doe-see?" Logan asked with raised eyebrows, Rory merely laughed in response, not feeling quite as lighthearted as her laugh sounded.

--

"What pasta sauce should I get, Ace?" Logan called out from across the aisle barrier.

"Uh… avoid the words 'made with real vegetables'. Wait! Pasta sauce! I can't make pasta!" She rushed around to where Logan was and looked into his shopping basket. Carrots, ravioli, peppers and spinach lay in the basket, along with an assortment of items that she didn't recognize. All it all, it was far to green for her liking.

Looking up at him, she pulled a face. "Vegetables?"

"Well lets see what you have then." Logan said, leaning forward with a smirk, "Captain crunch… fruit loops… pop tarts… beefaroni… Ben & Jerry's… Red vines, cookie dough and twizzlers… and three packets of tater tots?!" Logan listed with amusement. He knew that Rory ate a lot, but this? It was a diabetics nightmare!

"Jaw off the floor, mister." Rory scowled playfully, deciding to let him buy his vegetables. As long as he cooked she was fine with it, those Swedish boarding schools were good for a reason.

"You're like a walking cavity." Logan mused with a smirk.

Rory brought a hand to her mouth, "You always said you liked my teeth."

Logan grinned, "I do, especially the bottom ones." They held each others gaze for a little longer before making their way towards the register.

"Oh great!" Rory groaned, "Brianna, Taylor's 'I-don't-give-a-rats-ass-about-my-job' niece is on checkout! We're going to be here all night."

Logan laughed, "Relax Ace, she's packing up, she's just changing shifts."

Rory relaxed and Logan grinned at the small sigh that escaped her. Suddenly, Rory tensed again, her eyes going wide. Logan looked towards the counter to see one very tall, very familiar bagboy. Dean. Logan's jaw tensed as they continued waiting for their turn, both in silent anticipation while Dean was none the wiser of their presence.

"Next-oh… um… ah…" Dean stuttered once he saw who was waiting next in line.

"Quite a vocabulary you have there buddy." Logan said with a smirk while Dean continued to stare between the couple wide eyed.

"Hey Dean." Rory said quietly.

"Hey." Dean swallowed heavily and continued to stare.

"Um Dean?" Rory prodded.

"Huh? What? Yeah?" Dean shifted uncomfortably.

"Can you… uh, checkout our stuff?" Rory rolled her eyes slightly as Dean jumped into action and started swiping through boxes. "Hey… ah… Logan, you go ahead, I need to have a word with Dean." Logan looked at Rory curiously, but obeyed and started to make his way out of the small store.

"So?" Dean urged, looking less than intimidating in his green Dooses apron.

"I'm sorry about you and Juliet. I didn't mean to screw that up for you." Rory started, deciding against her usual method of beating around the bush.

Dean sighed, placing the box of cereal down and giving Rory his full attention, "Don't you get it? It was never going to work between Juliet and me, even looking past her insanely protective friend. You're always around. Damn it Rory, I love you. Sure, I don't fit in your world, but there's a point where that doesn't matter. I screwed up, but I love you."

Rory stared at him wide-eyed for a moment before throwing a bunch of money on the counter, picking up her bags and rushing out of the store. It was too much. She couldn't get back together with Dean! Then again, she was after all a familiarity addict.

--

_This chapter took me __forever to write. _So_ much procrastination to get through!! Anyway, I hope you like. I also hope you remember where the familiarity addict bit came from (ch4 last conversation with Lorelai). I really hope I'm not getting too far away from what people like or expected… basically, I hope you like it._

_I had work experience this past week and so didn't have time to post any updates, sorry for the delay._

_I'm also having a bit of writers block on the next chapter, so sorry for any more delays that might follow._

_I know, bits of this story are everywhere, but I have a plot, I know how it all ties together, I just have to hope that you readers (and I) remember what's going on - I'm not sure just how confusing this all is._

_Review, loves!_


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